Ok, so this question is inspired by a bit of a mess that seems to have found me. I can already hear Uncle laughing after he reads this, but I need some advice on this, too.

I have a new female admirer back home in Ohio. The problem? I have no interest in her and she appears to be crazy. She is a waitress at a restraunt my parents and I eat at all the time. On Sunday, she came up to my Mom and told her that she had gotten her first ever tattoo because it reminded her of me and then proceded to take off her shirt in the restraunt and show it to my mother. She then just kept talkng and talking and talking about me and asking all sorts of questions about when I was going to come back to her and what I was doing down here in Kentucky and just on and on. She was really nice to me when I went home last time but nothing that made me think that it was moving in this direction. I want nothing to do with this woman for a whole lot of reasons. Unc, I know you think lunatics make the best ass, but I have no interest in finding out with her.

I have never had a woman interested in me (although Dad used the term obessession on the phone yesterday) where I was completely disineterested. I have been on the receving end of some pretty shitty rejections, so I don’t want to hurt her feelings. I’m also pretty sure she’s at least slightly crazy based on other things she has told me in the past and, well, the fact that she got a tattoo over me. I know I could just stop eating there, but I don’t feel like I should have to and I really don’t want to. She’s known me for years so she knows I’m not gay and that I’m not dating anyone, so anything like that would be an obvious lie.

So, all that said, here is my question. How do I successfully get rid of her without hurting her feelings or winding up with a stalker?