graciousinhighheels is inspired!

be less dependent on my boyfriend
I'm responsible for my own happiness.

It all has to do with insecurity, or rather, security.

I’m always so tied up in my boyfriend that it’s driving ME crazy. He hasn’t said anything else, he says he doesn’t mind it but I do… and perhaps that’s the first step to being less dependent on him.

I sometimes feel like I’m happiest wrapped up in this bubble of just me and him and along the way, I’ve forgotten how to make new friends. I think it’s not a problem of being dependent solely on him – it’s a problem of being dependent on other people in general. I always feel as though I need someone to talk to, someone to tell my day to and someone to reassure me over the things I do. It’s mainly the latter and while I can blame my family for not being supportive enough over the things I do, I can also do the ‘grown-up’ thing and focus on MYSELF. I shouldn’t consistently be so self-conscious and worried about saying the wrong thing. I think one of the reasons I’m so dependent on him is because I’m scared. I’m scared other people won’t like me and I’m scared to be alone.

It all starts with being more secure and confident about myself. These two traits form the basis of almost every item on my to-do list.

People will always come and go. I can’t depend on someone else for my happiness, it’s not healthy and it’s not fair to him. It’s time I grew up and stand up for myself more often. I’m responsible for my own happiness.



Comments:

I have a question. My girlfriend or now my ex-girlfriend :( just broke up with me about an hour ago, stating that she is too dependent on me, and that shes too young to be having these thoughts of marrying me. I never saw signs of this at all. In fact I always thought she was too distant, and I was the one being too dependent. She says she still loves me and all that jazz, but does anyone think this could really be true reasons to break up with someone, or was i just let down easy, and what she really meant to say was “Im over you.” How do i know if im being lied to or not, or maybe it doesn’t matter either way.

graciousinhighheels is inspired!

Hey! First of all, I’m really sorry that this happened to you. I think it might be the case of her being over you… since you’ve always thought of her being distant. You sound like a great person, someone who cares about someone else alot and deserves to have that reciprocated.

Secondly… I think whether or not you’re dependent on someone else is a very subjective concept… when you’re in love with someone, one of the great things about it is having a life intertwined with yours, sharing hopes, dreams and experiences. So there will definitely be a certain amount of dependence and a healthy level of support going on.

I think this is starting to get really long. What I really want to say is that if you found her distant during the relationship, then it’s probably not the kind of relationship you want… both of you have different expectations and it might be the best decision ever made for you. =) Good luck!


 

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