Dear 43 Things Users,

10 years after introducing 43 Things to the world, we have decided we have met our last goal: completing the incredible experience that has been 43 Things. Please join us in giving one last cheer to all the folks who have shared their goals with the world, as well as all the people who have worked at The Robot Co-op to build this incredible website. We won a Webby Award, published a book, and brought happiness to a lot of people.

Starting today, 43 Things users can export their goals and entries from the site. Starting August 15, we will make the site “read only”. 43 Things users will still be able to view the site and export their content, but we won’t be taking any new content from users. We hope to leave the site up for folks to see and download their content until the end of the year. Ending on New Year’s Eve takes us full circle.

It has been a long ride (one of our original goals was to "build a company that lasts at least 2 years” - we beat that one!) While we wish the site could live on, it has suffered from a number of challenges - changes in how people use the site, the advertising industry, and how search engines view the site. We wish the outcome was different – but we’ve always been realistic about when our goals are met and when they aren't.

As of today, you will be able to download your goals and entries. See more about that on the FAQ page. Thanks for 10 great years of goal-setting and achieving.

- The Robots.

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~*Serenity*~ ~* I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, betwe

*~ Letters To My Hearts Husband!!! (read all 26 entries…)
I want to tell you. I am trying.

I have been so hurt in my past. I know most of the world has. I am not ever going to say I have been through more or harder.
I just want you to know that I am trying. Even now I am and when we are together I will.. I don’t want you to be punished for all the mistakes of the men before you. And please don’t punish me for what other women have done.
There is a lot of my life that you may find hard to believe {it all happened} things that may make you cringe and cry {it made me who I am}. I love to Dance…. *I dance all the time. When I went out that was the only reason I went. I dance around the house. I dance to hip hop.. {yeah, I can dance like that} and I love stepping. Oh how I hope you love to step. Or at the least slow dance. There are times I just want you to take me in your arms, lets say, I am cooking and we are listening to Etta. Take me in your arms and dance around the kitchen with me… I am showing you my tender side.

Trust has always been hard for me. I want you to understand why {please try to}. I am so much better than I was. I was betrayed so many times in life.. I was molested as a child {not my father} I was raped as a teen. I have suffered physical abuse as well as mental. Men, see in me this heart that will love unconditionally and they see this face. The Sexuality of me. So for many reasons, I have been used. Like most people in the world. I am such a sensitive person and I have had my heart shredded more times than I haven’t. I have been used, abused, cheated on, and abandoned. I am telling you this only so you know how far I have come. All these things as horrible as they are have made me who I am. {loving, considerate, honest, trustworthy, sincere.}.. I have been shot at more than once. Have you ever seen someone beaten until they were just a crumpled mess on the floor. {I have}. When I was oh about 15 I stepped in to stop someone I love very much from being hit again.. Instead this man over six foot 250 pounds Hit me. I literally went from one end of the room into the other. *I am strong. I am only giving you incidents {examples} by now you will know that there are many more stories and more to each one.

When my Ex Husband left. My house was in foreclosure, My children were so young. He put me through hell that last year. It was emotional torment like I had not ever dreamed. I saved my house, I took care of my babies, I worked ungodly amounts of overtime {sometimes, just so I didn’t think} I was so lonely. So afraid. I got cancer then and everything I owned was stolen. The day of my surgery, I got a check from the insurance company, I bought some things and had them moved into the house. I missed only one day of work. My babies had to eat. They needed their Mama to provide for them. So three days later everything was stolen again. I lost thousands. but it was only material possessions.. I lived between two crack houses. The raids would terrify my children. I would hear them coming down the street, after putting my babies on the floor, it was a mad dash to make sure all windows and doors were locked {addicts don’t think straight they would run to any house not being raided and then you were at their mercy.{we survived 5 raids in one summer} The house next door had parties all the time there would be gun fights, So I slept with my children on the floor {bulletts tend to go straight or up} your just safest laying on the floor.

During this time I found out the only sibling living in the same state as me was a Heroin and crack addict. Oh the hell you live when your brother is an addict. I was never allowed to sleep. I worked third and all during the day he would come beat on the door for money. Every time he was beaten My hospital called me in. To many stories to tell.
I survived.. I lived through it all. I made it, I am stronger now. It took me years to dig myself out of the financial mess I was left with when K left. I believe my brother had something to do with my house being broken into.
Wow, such drama huh.. Sorry, but it only a snap shot into my life. I am telling you this in my rather unsuccessful way. To show you, I may have trust issues but I can love. I don’t seek others attention, I can help my own self. I will never allow myself to be hit by a man, and I won’t hit you {self defence is some thing entirely different}. I know what if feels like to be lied to at every turn. To have trust betrayed on a whim. I won’t lie, I suppose I am capable as we all are.. I simply won’t do it.{that is a choice}
I know My Value is not in my body. {I am human and a women, I love being told how you feel about me.. sexy sensual, pretty what ever words you feel} I am so affectionate. See having men use my body when I was a child didn’t take that away. I am not an unemotional person. I am sincere and honest and loving. I think this letter should have been about wonderful sunshiny things. Well, life is tough sometimes. Just know this.
I have worked on being a better me since I was 15, I work on unrealistic expectation I place upon myself. I have learned and I have grown. I am strong, I am a survivor. I am determined.
I will work on any problem we will face in life. I am not perfect and I don’t expect you to be. No yelling and screaming in my home. {okay I have a teenager and a preteen} so let me say this. No yelling, screaming or belittling one another. Respect. Treat one another the way we ourselves want to be treated. I have made so many mistakes, bad choices in life. ]
I can smile though. I am always improving. I am always changing. It is a constant evolution, becoming me. Thank you for reading this, it’s easy to read happy great past experiences {I promise I will write one of those soon too}. Maybe this cast some light onto me. Maybe I just made a mistake in writing it and not ripping it up. {or delete}. But, if one person in this life comes away saying, I am not alone. My purpose has been served.My past does not control me, but to say it doesn’t matter is to deny the power of growth. Besides, you wanted to know why I was so strong. How many reasons did you find in here?
Light and Love…



Comments:

Holy shit!!

I’m exhausted from that and I just read it.

I’m never complaining about anything in my life again. (Ok, ok, I probably will, I’ll just feel guilty about simpering over next to nothing…)

Good for you, Ser…you’re doin’ good.

I have every reason to doubt my resiliance in the face of all that shit.

~*Serenity*~ ~* I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, betwe

Thank you Baby

But you know. You would be surprised by what you can overcome, get through, deal with. It’s not like everything happened in one year.
Honestly Uncle.
I am thankful for all my experiences the good happy ones and the not so happy. They have all made me and are making me who I am. Not Perfect.
Just a better Person
.

Plus...

You DO have massive mammaries…

~*Serenity*~ ~* I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, betwe

I do

I Do have massive mammaries.

I have even feed two children with these bad girls.

Yeah, buddy...

Plus, there is always the potential of hippy feeding…you know…feeding the odd hippy here or there…ahem…feeding…hippy…odd…you know?

Ahem.

I better nip this in the bud, eh?

nosebleed augh!

Wow

I have always thought you were a strong woman, but after reading that I think you must be made of steel. And it made you seem more beautiful to me than ever before. Thank you for sharing this with us, Ser.

~*Serenity*~ ~* I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, betwe

Thank You Love

For reading it. I am nothing special.
We all have the power of change within us. Now W M. You see why I tell you and remind you of the best of who you are. I may not know everything about you, but I see your heart, and that is Beautiful.

Believe and see in yourself all of the good of you. Life is hard sometimes. For everyone, all of us need understanding at times.

Thank you for saying I am beautiful

Wow

You are a strong, awesome mother.

~*Serenity*~ ~* I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, betwe

Thank you Baby.

We all have a strength in us that will amaze outsiders.
You have that very same strength.

When, told you can’t, find a way to accomplish.
When you feel all raw and unwanted {how I’ve been feeling lately} find within yourself the love of you.

when, the world gives you Nothing.
inside a small flame of hope burns. Maybe not bright, yet, it burns.

I am no more strong than anyone else. I fall and stumble, fuck up and say the wrong thing, bear my feeling and soul far to much.

I humbly thank you for the compliment. Strength recognize strength.
Light and Love

Calissa needs to make space to play

I'm not sure about your future husband.

But I think I understand you better after reading that.

No, not understand… more like I have a better idea of where you’ve come from and therefore a greater respect for who you are.

Thank you for sharing something so personal and so strong.

~*Serenity*~ ~* I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, betwe

Baby, it has always

been a part of who I am. That each experience, each love, each person is there to teach us something. It is our choice to learn the lesson or to let the evil of the world {sometimes not even the evil, but the horrible circumstances of life} destroy us and our hope.

If I can tell my story, or share my struggle and it make one person feel “not alone” or makes one person think they can make it, someone else has. Then my purpose has been fulfilled.

My purpose, my lesson the reason I’ve endured loss or pain has come to have meaning.

It may not be everyone’s way of thinking and I am not even saying it’s right or the best way. I am only saying it’s mine. My way of thinking.

Thank you Lissa for taking the time to read about me. That is a Treasure sweetie. Really. What a blessing to know that someone is reading things that do tell who you are.

It’s funny I was thinking the other day, there are so many things hidden in and among these posts, that if someone looked and just picked different topics and chose one of interest how much they would learn.

You just chose a big one huh.
Smiles at the dear sweet Calissa.

Calissa needs to make space to play

I think you've already done it.

You’ve helped people know they are not alone, have reminded them to love, love, love above all. You shine and it draws people to you. One only has to look around here to see that.

I’ve been poking through all the different topics so far. And I’ll keep working at the rest because I think you are a beautiful person and you inspire me. You remind me to live life to the full, to accept every part of who I am.

The world needs more people like you.

~*Serenity*~ ~* I love you as certain dark things are to be loved, in secret, betwe

I want to thank you for saying the sweetest things

to me honey. I have always wanted to shine. Not that kind of shine like a star or a pretty new object.

Just shine like the moon, quiet peaceful, shedding a little light in the dark.

I am beyond thankful Love that you said I inspire you, yes baby… Live, live live and enjoy, create memories with your family and cherish every moment all the small ones.

Calissa, love is the most important thing in this world. Giving it makes us whole, accepting us makes us complete.

Yes, I know the words sorta mean the same thing, but they are not the same thing are they baby. Complete and Whole are not the same..

Ahh, I will shut up now.
Light and Love.


~*Serenity*~ has gotten 9 cheers on this entry.

 

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