I went for my 2nd walk today, and I worked out with a video tape for 15 minutes. This was challenging for me. I still don’t look forward to doing it, but I think the pain of not changing my life is worse, so I’m deciding to endure this one instead.

My plan is to walk and run for 1 extra block everyday (at the very least 4 to 5 days a week). If I run for 1 extra block everyday, I think I can conquer this fear I have of getting exhausted. Here we go, I’m trying once again.

I already have dropped some of the weight – it has taken me too long though (like 1 1/2 year to drop 10 pounds). I must be getting older. And that included time in Jenny Craig and a 10 day diet with a 1.5 day fast – not to mention sick time. Overall I think I live on a permanent diet.

So now I have 7 more pounds to go, but if I lift weights, the pounds might not show in the scale. So I’m hoping for 7 pounds of fat and/or a dress size 4. That should do it.

This is so hard for me because I feel so week, but I’m going to try to do it imperfectly, so I don’t give up. I’ll do something, instead of doing it perfectly and I’ll consider that a success.

I read something today about ambition and patience being the perfect pair. So I’ll keep that patience part in mind instead of the result part, and maybe that will help me stick with it.

Next, after the walking/running thing becomes part of my life, I want to go back to the gym. Bally is getting rich at my expense, so I better lose the fear, find the time and use it! Or, find the $ and the space and workout at home with a home gym. I think the 1st option will work faster.