Glasgow was a good city, I just fell madly in love with the wrong person at the wrong time and living in a brand new larger city isolated me even more, and I blamed the city and the course and that bloody art school, when really I was just heartbroken.

The only thing that kept me sane was the writing, I’d never ever show some of the crap I came out with, but at the time it really helped, it also really helped me grow as a writer. I’m happy now but can I write a damn thing?? Can I heck!

These things just creep up on you, you can’t do anything about those sodding feelings, and it’s shit it’s shit it’s shit. But hopefully, very worth it. It just might make you a bit crazy in the process.

What better time to go on an adventure in London and be surrounded by your adoring fans than when you’re sad and missing your man?

I don’t really have a knack for accents, but I’ll speak like a Scotsman for you because it’ll be really funny.

We’ll have a grand time, babykins. Even if you were weeping the whole time, I’d be happy to be there, offering you a hankie and a hug.

(My ride to the airport is on their way to pick me up! Squee!)

I won’t see you being a misery guts or anything else which is a damn shame because I was really hoping to see you in person cos you make me laugh every day in virtual.

Kind of complicated but I am hosting a fortieth birthday cum grandmothers-of-milton-keynes-reunited this weekend and can’t sneak off.

Hope you all have a fantastic time, am so jealous that you’re all going to meet and I’m stuck here, but I’m hoping that it will be so nice there’ll be a next time. Have fun!

I wish you were coming. Casey and I would squish-hug you and buy you lots of crisps and Vimto.

Dammit, you know, there was almost a mini-meet at O’Hare airport earlier today. Both Travellover and Headapollo were there, and emailed me to say so, though they didn’t know the other was there at the time. You could have rolled up and arranged a spontaneous meet.

...for title of King and Queen. Dwlt and I are coming up on our first anniversary.

I have been wondering about skype. I don’t think we need it now though, we get enough of each other now I think. It’s all relative – at first it was really really hard and seemed really unfair that we didn’t get to spend enough time together, and now we have enough (more than enough somedays, it seems). I would love to know how that works.

My experience is that if I keep getting more and more wrapped up in a relationship, eventually the relationship deteriorates. I don’t know but I suspect this is because my expectations of it increase at the same rate, and eventually no kind of relationship can live up to them. And that, I suspect, is because no kind of relationship is big enough or great enough to take up the entire space of one person’s life.

It boggles me, how it works, because I get tied up in the “relationships need work” and “the more you give to a relationship the better it is” type logic, but I know from trial and abysmal errors that doing things for myself, taking care of myself, putting time aside for myself, improves the quality of the time I spend with him, increases what I have to give him, and he is happier because I am happier because he is happier because… blah blah blah to pukeworthy infinity.

Because of our relationship we are both able support each other in living our own lives. With more gusto than before.

_{following the conclusion of this sugar-coated epistle I shall be retiring to my chair of thorns to extract three teeth and a toenail or two.}

It took me 18 months of doing nothing but yucky love stuff before I realised I had chores to finish.

^{it’s nice though}