he is just playing with you because you let him. he thinks it’s funny. You have to get another date with him somehow but be all cool and and happy and slowly seize power from him. Do not discuss your relationship. Just have fun. Don’t call him for thirty days unless he calls you. Set a date with him and break the first one. Remember to look at the big picture.

If you wanna see how not to do these things, read my entry @ Dreamwriter02282001.

Hi,

I’ve been there and i guess so many other women have.
This is very traumatising! You cant sleep at night, your mind is spinning continuously and you are very very desperate.

You’re probably at the stage where you’ll try anything to get this guy back and you’re also looking for assurance that this CAN happen! I know I did it! dreamwriter is correct in saying what he has said and in hindsight i wish i had this advice as well. It is also dependent on where the ex is in his life.
But a man is a funny thing – always wants what he cant have and the trick is to pull him in whilst you holding him back if that makes sense?

So what you’re trying to do is slowly establish a deep bond whilst he cant get everything he wants. So keep him at arms lenth whilst you make him crazy for you. Now i can go on and on about “move on” don’t go there etc ect, but I know the feeling and i feel if you want to really try again you can , if after that it doesn’t work out, then only you can decide to leave it.
You have to work with what you have – so maybe establish a calm friendship at first – dont push – he’ll feel like a trapped animal if u do and will run immediately.
No pressure – whilst doing this just work on the friendship bond – now even if he starts to make moves -BEWARE he’s also testing you!! Donr fall for it keep him back – this does 2 things. 1. he sees there’s no desperacy 2. he feels secure and can continue as you were.
Maybe a month or 2 down the line set a “date” dont let him percieve it as a date but just go do something. Be the best you can be – have fun show your best side – DONT fall into his arms here and try cut the date short – leave him wanting. do this 2-4 time – always leave him wanting no matter how hard it is for you. Just keep focused on the long term goal.

He also will use you if he sees he can fall into your arms any time.
So the message you got to give out is – im a great person to be with, im worth it – but if you ever wnat me back you’ll have to wrk dam hard for me.

If after all this nothing happens then he truly has moved on. Keep this in mind before embarking on this as you may take yourself down a long lonely trip to end up with nothing. Its u[p to you if you want to put yourself up for this or not.

I just want to say – I never thought I would move on – I loved this guy totally and thought life had ended, but i did move on eventualy – and most of the moving on part is your own decision in the end – if you going to keep harping on the past it will never die.
Every time you get a thought that distresses you – replace that though – or push it out your mind and move onto another thought completely – you have to really try in the beginning but it does get easier.
Another question – do you want to be with someone who’s going to be calling women when he’s pissed?
This could be an ongoing lifetime saga!
I think not.
Keep that in mind and feel sorry for the next poor girl.
I think you deserve more. And there are millions of great guys out there you just have to find themm – and its not hard cos they looking for you too!

Go have fun!!