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Em so basically i’ve felt down on and off for a long long time now. It’s been gettin more and more severe over the last 6 months maybe and just getting too much for me to cope with on my own. I think there’s a possibility I could be diagnosed ‘borderline personality disorder’ but then im not a doctor.
I’m pretty scared about doing this.
It might take some time before I even start looking at therapies because at the minute the thought of even telling someone how I feel is scaring me.
But I will definitely look in to CBT it sounds like a good idea.
Thanks for the advice.
Thanks for the engouragement. Im just trying to find the right person to tell and get up the courage to talk to some one soon. Hopefully I can move from there. =]
I’m just apprehensive about bringing up the idea of seeing some kind of therapist with my mum. I don’t know how to explain things to her.
Thank you so much for all the advice and encouragement, I really appreciate it.It’s good to hear about other people who have experienced similar things and got through them =]
Shannon just me...less extraordinary...more plain ole me.
Depression really sucks when you don’t deal with it.
Promise.
I can also tell you, from very personal experience that it doesn’t have to be this way.
I’ve been fighting depression for a long time. Most people don’t know what it really is and maybe I don’t either. Mine is a combination of depression and anxiety. Talk about contradiction.
Anyway, talking to someone about how you feel is a good idea. Just need someone to listen.
Your right people don’t seem to understand it. I’ve tried to mention how I feel to various friends once or twice before but usually get a reaction like “OMG I know I get like that too, like last week I broke a nail and I just felt so bad…” or something to that effect. And in no way am I trying to say that other peoples problems are any less than mine but I dunno it just seems the whole idea of depression is a very misunderstood idea.
Yea I just don’t know who I’ll talk to yet.
Thanks for the encouragement.
Yea it can get very frustrating when people behave like that. Sometimes I just feel like turning round and saying “well actually no, you have no idea”.
Incidentally I have a friend who has decided to leave school this week because of panic attacks. I don’t want her to, I think she should try to stay in school and get help with them rather than just leave school and try to ignore them. But also I don’t want to sound like Im bullying her in to anything.
Snookie
How are you doing with this? Any updates? My sister developed panic attacks beginning in high school and lasting her throughout Uni (she just graduated Uni). Her panic attacks were brought on by a specific traumatizing even in her life (she was raped). I’m not sure if there could be anything similar going on with you or your friend?
Is there anything that specifically makes you think you have BPD? I have taught teenages with BPD before and one of the things I notice with it frequently is the their sudden shift in attitude from idealization (great admiration and love) to devaluation (intense anger and dislike).
I think that what others have suggested about talking to someone is best.
Take Care,
Sissy
just trying to get on with things as best I can really.
Well my friend has since left school and is doing ok again, I think she was just unhappy with the amount of work and stuff which was causing her panic attacks. Has your sister managed to overcome hers?
I’ve been havin a pretty bad couple of days lately but hopefully it’ll pass.
The BPD thing came about after I seen a documentary thing, some of the similaraties freaked me out. I looked it up online and it freaked me out even more. I mean I’ve known for a long time that I’m not where I should be mentally so to speak, but I never actually associated it with doctors, medication that sort of thing. In particular my self-image, behaviour and such are very instable. Like you mentioned switching from idealisation to devaluation. I can’t be sure though obviously since I’m too scaredy to even approach my doctor on the matter.
Thanks for the support,
Ali
Snookie
I imagine it’s a horrible feeling to have to wonder if there is something that needs addressing but be to scared to ask anyone for help.
One thing to keep in mind, is we are usually harder on ourselves and see ourselves much worse than others see us. Going to someone you could trust and speaking on this matter could maybe help you relieve the stress you have worrying about what might be going on. Hopefully you’ll be able to in time because until then you’ll have to worry and wonder is it something I need medication for? Is it hormonal? Is it chemical? etc.
I think it’s normal what you’re feeling as taking that “first” step and opening up to someone is the hardest. However, you could hopefully alleviate much of the stress you’re having now by doing just that. Also, many times when we read or hear about illness, disease, conditions we panic and think “that sounds like me” or “I do that”! This is also normal behaviour for many of us (especially those of us who tend to have a low self-concept or are very self-critical). I actually think you sound quite healthy to be able to talk about these things here and describe what you’re feeling.
Regarding my little sis. Her panic attacks are infrequent now. She discovered the guy who raped her was murdered (a drug related homicide) and she was actually happy about that. It seemed like after she heard that news and graduated Uni she was more comfortable and not having the attacks. However, she’s going away to school in the summer so let’s just hope they won’t come back strong or hard.
You take care of yourself and keep us posted if you feel comfortable doing so.
Cheers,
Sissy
Well see one or two of my friends know, mainly because they know me far too well to keep anything from them. It was actually one of them who first suggested I should see someone because she thought i could be bi-polar, personally I don’t think that’s the case but I do know there is something that needs to be addressed, wether it be borderline personality or something completely different.
But thing is I can’t really talk to them…I’m just not good at sharing my feelings on the really important stuff. I can write it here and let the world read it, but when it comes down to a face to face discussion I just clam up. Bit of a closed book in that respect.
I’m glad to hear your sister is doing better now. I really hope it stays that way =]
Snookie
I really hope it stays that way for her too! She actually has a very nice boyfriend now :-)
Yeah, I understand what you mean about it being easier to type the things here rather than talk about them face to face in real life with someone. I know you tried to make a note to show your Mum or someone before and I think that would be the route to go. Keep trying, eventually everything will turn out. Just remember not to be too hard on yourself. I can remember back in Uni taking my psychology classes on personality disorders and my Special Ed classes on different disabilities and thinking to myself, “wow, I fit this description”. Many times we can feel a bit too hard on ourselves.
Also, remember that even people in the highest professions struggle with these things. I work with a lot of counselors and school psychologists at the facility where I work. Many of them have told me they currently see or have sought out therapy or medications to deal with different issues and such (and these are people whom are so professional and seem so together, you’d never suspect it). It kind of brings home the reality of how we are all vulnerable people… no matter what titles we may carry in our professional life. It’s important to remember this, when we start to feel out of place in this world. Asking for help is something everyone needs to do from time to time. It is self-advocating for YOU, which is a great skill to have.
Take care, Sissy
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confused101 wants to Beat my depression
get up on time
learn to play the harmonica
cast a spell on someone.
go to the oscars
watch southpark
Strength train
paint my kitchen
Learn to cook
create a non-profit organization
make a collage
shoemaker wants to have more self control
find at least one thing each day that makes me happy and record it everyday for a year
Sing
figure out what clothes suit me and fit me
Watch a Joan of Arcadia Episode
i want to live in the wild
embrace
Upgrade my PC
Become Financially Independent
house
ATLfemme wants to meet like minded people
dream lucidly
bellydance
build an online portfolio
read 12 books in 2010
