Ugh. How is it you can marry someone – believing you would spend the rest of your life with them – and end up despising them so much that you can taste bile when you think of them?

Oh, I know. It’s a long and sordid story. A story that had my shrink gasping in awe at times. So I’m not going to retell it here.

I will say that the amicable and relatively pain free divorce I yearned for is not going to be. I’ve just switched from a completely incompetent junior lawyer to the big gun in the firm and the gloves are off.

All was going to go as it should have, no changes to the separation agreement, and then he decided it’s NOT FAIR that he has to pay child support. Why? Because I am engaged to a man who is financially secure. He is semi-retired, likes to travel, and wants his partner free to accompany him on both business and hobby trips. Consequently I don’t work. Not because I don’t want to – I liked having a professional life. But because he is more important to me and because it is excruciatingly difficult to find a job/career which allows you to have every other week off just to hang with your partner.

Because I don’t work, the father of my child has deemed it NOT FAIR (his favorite lament) and wants to have my (non existant) income imputed to be the same as his so that he does not have to pay child support.

The cheap SOB.

And he has always been cheap. I grew accustomed to it. Everything split down the middle. Hey, no problem. Until our daughter came along, and his career – regularly taking him away from home for ten to fifteen days at a time – came first and my life as a realtor came to a virtual end. Just try caring for a colicky baby, trying to keep your career afloat, not being entitled to maternity benefits because you are considered self employed.

When he started having to pony up where I was falling short that is when our marriage started falling apart. Nevermind the mistress, the lies, the whining, the lack of help around the house when he was home, the neglect and on and on.

Now he wants to cheap out on his daughter.

Well, not a chance buddy. The fight is on.