in the behind dept {I know that sounded all wrong} I just mean, you don’t have to do any catching up. I’ve not posted anything about it.

Just having a wrecky heart time is all.

on myself before.
I have a king size bed and about a thousand pillow {slight exaggeration} when I sleep I put pillows all around me. I sleep with my feet toward the wall, then I put pillows all around me. This way no matter whether I roll from one side to the other, I have a pillow to pull close.

When I was married my husband started working third shift when I was pregnant with our first child. I was so alone and scared {we didn’t live in the best place} doing that gave me a sense of not being alone. The pillows had his smell.

When he left {years later of course} I once again made sure I was in a Hug of pillows, for the same reasons. It seems to be a habit that I’ve not broken.{even though the marriage has been over for 8 years now}

I imagine it will end when there is another who sleeps with me. When he makes me feel that safe and comforted, I am sure it will be his back I hug up next too.

My make up runs, my eyes are all puffy, and I get snot in my moustache.

this way. Honey you can talk to me. Email me sweetie. I know this sound like little comfort, especially if knowing why the tears come is illusive. Everything will get better sweetie. It can’t last for ever can it… There is an end and the light will dispel all the dark.

I am being most sincere if you want someone to talk to. I am here for you, I don’t have any magic answers but I do have a little magic {smiles at that} I’ll even listen.

You know Calissa, as much as you are there for me. You can come to me as well love. I promise you I don’t discuss anything talked about. I keep all things private and I surely don’t judge, sometimes we just need someone to talk to, it opens our eyes and gives us our own answers. Just having someone listen helps.

Light and Love.

I not only have room made for you. I’ll hold you close and let you cry for hours till you feel better.

then we’ll go be bad girls {you know I’m kidding}...

Honey, I’m here. I may not be able to respond quick but you know you can write and vent, talk, cry to me. I do know how to listen once in a while.

I love you sweetie.

ones sweetie, for the tears are the size of crocodiles. I love this tree of yours honey. You’ve a blessing coming love, a true blessing.

I know when I was younger {much younger} I never cried. I just kept emotions so locked inside of me I found it difficult to shed tears…

Even though crying solves nothing, it does release the tension {like you said}

Honey next time you feel that sad that you want to cry and the tears won’t come. I’ll give you a hug tight.

Positives will come… eventually

Light and Love Darlin’

Were you to be close to my bed holding towel and playing “relief”...

I think I just would toss a few of those pillows off the bed or under me. You know which ever.

So when I need you into el beddo do I just give a shout or a certain come hither look.

even when I don’t want them to.
I am letting them all out honey.

I’ve tried to stop crying and it’s a loosing game.

It could be hormaonal, I am going through menopause…

Thank you for the Hug RSB…

I won’t feel this way for ever, just a little wrecky heart thing is all it is. No Biggie.