I’ve decided journalism is not for me. It’s crazy because for the longest time it was the only thing I could see myself doing as a career. I don’t know when it hit me that it didn’t make me happy anymore. I feel like I’ve been lying to myself the whole time kinda. I remember my journalism teacher telling me I had the best part of the paper because I got to tell people’s stories. And I loved telling people’s stories. I remember my story on Dakota and how much it changed my whole perception of myself, people in general and journalism. Then I began feeling like all journalist do is thrive on other people’s misfortune to get a “good story.” There’s no way to get around that because it’s the truth. But I thought I’d be different because I actually cared about the people I wrote about. But when it all boils down to it…it’s not right. I’ve won awards for a story about a girl who has cancer. I have no idea how Dakota is now, I don’t know if her cancer has gotten better or worse but I honestly do think about it from time to time. But I don’t feel like my story helped Dakota in anyway or change the world or people at school. It didn’t do anything but make my journalism teacher happy and me feel good about myself as a writer. That is not what I want to do and I can’t imagine myself doing that for a living. Maybe some reporters make a difference but I don’t think I would’ve made a difference talking about makeup in some fashion magazine.
After realizing this, I was kinda scared. I had no idea what I wanted to do. So, I took a step back, and thought about what I love to do that doesn’t have to do with college or work. I love to help people and make a difference. Soooo, I’ve decided to change my major to social work. I don’t want to be a social worker but I would love to work for advocacy programs, community development programs, or homeless programs or even a nonprofit org. Im so excited about this decision!! I wanna volunteer at this child advocacy center in Lincoln over the summer…hopefully it works out. Now I just gotta break the news to my parents :/
Besides journalism was just a half-assed way to write for a career. To be just a writer wouldn’t have been acceptable to my parents because I would’ve been poor. But now, I can still write, and write about whatever I want and have a great career at the same time! But still be poor…but I don’t mind. Poor and happy baby =)