So 2 of my goals have to do with getting a physical and having my mamogram to stay cancer free. So I got the appointments for Tuesday. I took the day off work and set up the appointments to be done in one day. As part of preparing for my physical, I am making a list of the things going on in my body that concern me, so I can ask the doc. I realized, I am not in too good of shape. Metaphorically. As time goes on, I am becoming more worried about the pain in my breast. I am pretty sure it’s from the scar tissue of having cancer a couple of years back. I am just paranoid and remembering how hard it was to handle cancer when my life was going great. Now that my life is upside down and I have virtually no support network, what is going to happen if it came back? I just heard of a co-worker’s mom who “got it all” 8 years ago and now she’s all but dead because they missed some that was too small to see. And while I don’t want to be the person who makes it all about them, I feel this is my place in the world where it can be all about me. I’m just worried. and stressed, and exhausted. I’m not looking really for any encouragement by writing this, just using this as my journal for today I guess.