Mother’s day morning never was ment to be like the one I had when I heard my youngest twin’s voice screaming about the baby’s nose bleeding. I looked over to see my baby’s face covered in blood and she was not breathing. When I finally waved down a person to call the ambulance, I knew that she was gone. Too much time had went by as I ran around trying to get some one in the hotel to call some one for me. too much time had passed, and the nieghbor woman, who I hardly knew, was out of breath trying to blow into the small body and she laid my baby onto the bed right before the flashing lights and sirens came. She was gone and as I rode in the car downtown under investigation, the Sacramento County Child Protective Department was taking my still living children into custody. Now one of my children was dead and the other five taken. I was alone in the empty and trashed hotel room where I had tried to destroy all I could get a hold of after the parametic woman told me, “I am sorry, We can’t do anything for your baby.” After we saw her body burried in what looked to be a shoe box, I did some thing that I swore to never do. I allowed my mother to pursuade me to return home, back to San Diego, where my blood family was. After over ten years, I couldn’t fight any more. When the autopsy on my daughter was completed I was cleared of harming my child, and my other five were back with me, on our way to San Diego. Back to the city where I swore to never return. I left behind my baby, burried under the soil in an umarked grave…I want to go see her…but with bearly enough money to pay the rent, I only have memories of her first smile. Her only smile. And March 29th, we all have a birthday party for the sister no longer here. Have we totally grieved her departure from us? Not long enough, for once we arrived in San Diego all hell broke loose and hasn’t stopped since!