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Ivymere finds strength...somewhere, somehow

make a difference (read all 12 entries…)
A friend

thanked me a couple nights ago for expanding her horizons. I was kind of surprised since this was unexpected. I mean, I know I’m probably one of the more well-rounded people in my various circles (I have different social circles I hang with, not just one big group) but I never really thought of me as one to influence. I’ve seen myself as a half-outsider (since I do mingle) or the one that’s kind of on the outer circles within a circle. I don’t even know if that makes sense – I’m not very coherent about this friendship stuff since it’s so abstract sometimes.

Anyway, so that was kind of surprising but I’m glad. :)



what you say was me for a long time. I always felt like I was there but not there, feeling like the guy everyone knew but didn’t really know as a person. except for a few people, who were my closest friends, everyone only saw the outside me, someone that was just a random person that hung with everyone. It took a major shock to shake me loose from that existance, where I became my own person, not the random guy everyone hangs with. While I miss it at times, I wouldn’t change how I am for the world because it made me a stornger person.

Ivymere finds strength...somewhere, somehow

Right right

It’s a feeling that kind of sucks, right?

So you’re not the random guy anymore? If you had to describe your social circle now, how would it be like?


it felt that way for me beceause I didn’t know how to fit in besides being the random guy. I am no longer that guy because I was put in a situation where no body knew me and I was forced to make new circles. I learned that I had to be myself and forget about the people that in all honesty I thought of as friends but would let me get shot b4 taking a bullet for me. Thats how I started to tell my real friends from the others. my social circle is new friends that I have made. also I’m working on getting a girl and seeing how that goes. she’s a new friend so I can’t say how that will turn out. just be yourself, I know practically everyone and his mom is saying that these days but it’s true. some people would describe their lives as different as a combination of worlds. your school world, your home world, your work world, friend world, and so on. try combining those worlds and at the center should be the real you. try it.

Ivymere finds strength...somewhere, somehow

I'm glad you like how you've changed

I am being myself. The thing is, I’m being different parts of me when I’m with dfifferent people. I feel most quirky with my writerly peeps, more upbeat with my shopping buddies, broody yet exhilarated with my theatre friends, etc etc. It’s rare I find a person, much less a group, I can share several interests with that is on the same level as I am.

I don’t really actually like to combine my worlds, if that makes sense. I don’t mind if it’s acquaintances but if it’s friends, most of my friends (and I include myself in this category) are the type to prefer smaller groups or one-on-one hanging out.

thats great

I’m glad that you understand. I can find few people that can actually make sense of half the stuff I say. I also prefer smaller groups and the like in a conversation, because it is harder to have one when random people are making inputs. but I don’t think that is what I was talking about when I said combine your worlds. I didn’t mean combine your friends, because not all friends will get along when they have the same friend as a focal point. I meant combine how you act and your emotions from all of the ways you act with those friends togeather then boil it down till you have the true you togeather, not in parts separated. you do not even need to have your friends with you when you do this.

Ivymere has gotten 4 cheers on this entry.


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