createkg is resting
I have come to the conclusion that this must happen before all else. I have MANY things I want to accomplish… and many more things to add to my list here… but really it boils down to quiting this – now – life abating habit. Everything else I want to accomplish is effected by this. For example – 1. losing weight. This task may be difficult to begin with, but it becomes extremely difficult to do when you are constantly craving donuts/pizza/anythingthatisnotgoodforyou and having negative 10% motivation to do anything other than indulge your growing midsection … how in the hell am I going to do anything when I can only bring myself out of the reclined couch position to microwave more hot pockets??? WTF?? The crazy kicker is that I know this addiciton is destroying my life, self, self esteem, creativity – motivation—yet I continue to smoke. Well mi amigos “todays the day!” And I dont want to tell anyone I know. I’ve fallen into this over and over – a horrible feeling of self betrayal made real by vocalizing my plans to others. I will quietly mark on my calendar tomorrow as day one. And continue to visit this page to grow my list.

