Well, I’m totally collecting all the self-digust I can muster. It’s been three months.. I’m nowhere where I used to be, I now have a plan. However, nothing in my life right now competes with the feeling of being relaxed and care-free sensation of a bottle of wine. I still drink. I planned to get rid of the bottle all together, start a raw food diet, be one with myself, find the love of my life, and everything will be okay. It never was.
I find myself searching for these things..I get frustrated because it’s not happening. I come home from working out..I sit in front of the t.v. and I’m numb. I think, “at least if I had a drink I can feel, I can feel something”. I hate to say it. I hate to think, that my life is more artistic, more thoughtful, with a bottle of wine. I’m told that this is bad, and I feel that this is bad when I wake up in the morning with a crazy hangover. When it comes to 6pm—-I cuddle a bottle of merlot as most of you might your girlfriend, your boyfriend, yourself.
I wish something could compete with this, but it doesn’t.
