I had a new experience with the Dictator and Wild Child last night that had nothing to do with weight loss. I had completed, a couple of hours earlier, a plan for the next couple of weeks. I was thinking about how pleased I was with my plan when I suddenly had a feeling of panic. And, I realized that this was a familiar feeling after I’ve just made a plan. In the past, I would have squashed the feeling but with recent experiences, I asked myself “what’s up with that?”

A few minutes later, I got the answer. When I have a new plan, my inner Dictator rubs his hands with glee over the opportunity to order all my inner minions around to accomplish this new plan. At the same time, my Wild Child is convinced that I’ll never do anything fun or spontaneous again (never mind that there are fun things in the plan—she can’t see that when the inner Dictator has that look in his eyes). The Wild Child’s response to the Dictator is “NO F-ing WAY!” It’s no wonder that my plans often disintegrate within 24 hours of putting them on paper.

I’m not sure what to do with this revelation, but I was able to get myself in the Watcher frame of mind, so maybe that’s all I need to do with it for now.