It is good to be honest with how you are feeling. It may not be the best idea to say something with the intention of hurting another, but it is one way to handle things. Nothing is necessarily right or wrong. What feels the best to you? If you know that you are going to say something that is cruel or mean in intent, why say it? If you are just going to say it because they hurt you, maybe consider stepping away if you can for a moment to collect yourself and then come back and say what it is you need to say. There are many ways to say things without being brutal. I personally don’t believe in “brutal” honesty. There are ways to say things without intentionally hurting others. Know too, that when you do start to speak up for yourself people may have a difficult time with that because you are the “nice person who lets themselves get walked on”. If you say something and it was not based on hurting someone else and they just don’t like what you had to say, know it’s THEIR problem. Not yours. Many times when I speak my mind I do it out of love and know when people get angry with what I’ve said that it is their garbage their processing and very little, if any of it has to actually do with what has been said. I’ve retrained people on how I will be treated and what type of treatment I will accept. My relationships are better and ones that were around that did not serve me in a positive manner are gone. YAY! Good luck. You can do it.