Here lately I’ve been stressed alot. Between a huge test I’ll have to take soon and my boyfriend’s job, it’s been hard NOT to worry. I hardly hear from my boyfriend now, so I get worried whether or not he is OK. Since he lives in Europe, and I don’t have a cell phone, it’s hard to contact him.

But here recently, I’ve realized a few things. Through worry I get nothing done – through worry, I hurt myself. In the end, worry will cause the pain, not anything that happens. What happens will happen, whether it is wanted or not – worry will never change the outcome. But, it is a natural feeling that should never be entirely forced away. Like crying, sometimes it is necessary to worry as a human being. To lock it up is like locking up a piece of human-nature. It’s not right.

But, if one worries too much, it can hurt oneself. And that I’ve done – I had hurt myself through worry (stomach pains, racing heart, etc). Before anything terrible could happen though, I had to realize what everyone was telling me. I cannot say I’m “cured” because I’ll always have some sort of worry when things don’t go as planned, but I’m doing my best to keep “cool” and not let it get to me.

I realized that I’m somewhat of a “rock” in a storm. People I know may hold onto this “rock” when the going gets tough. If I become overworried and panicky – then suddenly I’m not the stable support family members, friends, and even my boyfriend needs when the time comes. I have to be strong for them, and they’ll be strong for me. (again, this doesn’t mean I have to hide all my worry, because that’s not natural!)

So, what do I do? I can do only one thing: keep going. When I start worrying, say a quick prayer, trust that God is going to help protect or help things out, and keep going with the day. Just put my faith in that everything will – one way or the other – work out, and keep going.

I’m going to scratch this thing off as “done” because I believe that I somewhat achieved this. ^^