I have a body like a classical Venus statue or a Pre-Raphaelite girl. Wide hips, full thighs, average waist and a small chest. I think that these women have beautiful bodies; but somehow I haven’t quite reached accepting that mine, too is beautiful.
Most of the girls I know are thinner than me with a larger chest. The absolute media idea is a thin girl with a large chest. There are also girls who are thin all over, and girls who are “curvy” who are accepted. But it’s hard for a girl who doesn’t fit either mold. Who isn’t thin, but doesn’t have the chest to match it.
Somedays I’m happy with what I see. Some days I’m not. I never used to have these problems. Once I was 5’4 and 125 lbs, and later 5’6 and 135, and happy with my body. But something happened, I don’t know how. I went on diet, lost some weight; now I am 5’6 and around 123 lbs. I am still unhappy.
I want to get the old feeling back, the old I-don’t-give-a-damn, I-look-like-a-goddess attitude. I’m not known as an insecure person. People tell me they ‘admire my confidence’. If only they knew it was a facade.