I went through a dark period in my life and I can tell you that all I wanted to do during that time was drive my car through a tree. Instead I ended up turning to dancing. It took a lot out of me at first because my heart wasn’t into it but after a while it became my moment of escape. Everything around me just seemed to go away and I could finally express all the rage and grief and pain I felt through my dance techniques. It helped me heal. I’m not sure dancing is your solution but maybe there is something out there for you that you already enjoy doing physically or that you have yet to discover. I know that physical activity of some kind is a great way to push through the hard times. I tried other stuff before dancing to try ease my mind but those activities required sitting and thinking and I always ended up reverting back to the painful episodes I was trying to escape. I found out that physical activity helped me cope better because I could put my whole self into it and consequently I lost weight from it. Whatever you decide to do, I hope that it works well for you and that you are able to get through this difficult time in your life.