that really means a lot. im at a place i love other peoples opinions because i have so many ideas right now. i know the main thing i want, which sounds kind of bad, but its what itruly want, i want to have her in my life, somehow, as a friend at leasty. like… im not done. i dont want closure, i want a new beginning. and also, i want to mvoe out. like she lives in a differnt state as me, and i cant be her friend from all the wayb over here, and i wont accept being her friend from a distance, thats not REALLY the friendship i want to create with her. I want to be able to go to her house and play guitar hero, or eat food with her or whatever, or stay up late and talk to each other. i jsut wish things were different, like at a different place. like i dont have anyone here i can do that with, nowadays everyones so busy and scheduled. like i wish it was like dawsons creek, like back in high school ya know. i dunno, growing up and living life as an adult is so weird. i mean i dont exactly have the same responsibilities as i would when i start to live on my own, like i live at home so i dont pay bills, and i dont even go to school or have friends to “go to”. im so stressed with life, and big decisions, and depressed and trying to fight for something in this relationship.I dont want to go our separate ways ya know. Its my own choice and no one can deter me from what I truly want. Even if I fail, at least I’ll have tried in doing something for myself, even if it seems risky. It may not be the normal route, but hey, I believe certain things are worth it. I jsut haev a lot of big life decisions and figuring out to do, ESPECIALLY with this moving out thing, its way complicated, I havent a lot of moeny right now..