it has been almost a week now since I have even thought about this …lol

that is really a change
ok so a lot has been going on, I’ll grant you that.
and I’m at my daughter’s house in Germany…
who doesn’t even own a scale, so there is on temptation to jump on the scale every time I walk in and out of the room, which was my normal habbit… (just too see if there has been a change.. yeah… even I know that’s crazy… but I couldn’t help it)
while I’ve been here I have been focused on keeping others together… keeping the baby alive and mother composed.

I have no idea what I weigh right now.. I’m almost afraid to go back home at the moment and find out… but my time here is coming to an end and I will be leaving in a few days

when I started writing this I felt really good.. that I had been doing well and eating right… now I am in panic mode … what if I have gain too much?

maybe I should stop eating for awhile

maybe I should stop thinking and just do what I know is right
sometimes feelings aren’t always a good thing

just breathe