i guess it is because i am so self-aware; i know my weaknesses so well, that i avoid things that trigger them. i am VERY good at justification. i hope that simply by writing this down where people can see it, i will embarrass myself out of stopping myself. i know i have the skills, i know i have the spark. i guess i just have too much of the wisdom and have lost too much of the innocence/ignorance…. blind faith isn’t doing it for me lately. i see things coming down the road and i predict the outcome before i even take the first step. well, i really need to stop that.