I haven’t talked to him in weeks…
until yesturday

I didn’t go to school today, I heard my dad talking to someone. I thought it was someone on the phone until I heard another voice talking back…his voice. I quickly ducked into my room & stayed there until they left.

When they came back a few hours later, I ducked back into my room again but he came in. He hugged me & kissed me on the forehead like he had done a few times before. But it didn’t feel happy like it had before. All of the things I had rehearsed in my head to say to him over & over flew out the window. I didn’t(couldn’t) say anything. He left right after.

Before that, I had been walking around the house, replaying memories like a movie in my head of us together.

Now I’m sitting here at 2 in the mourning. My heart hurts in my chest but I know there’s not something medically wrong with me. Other times, when I thought it was love, I got the feeling in my stomach but this is different.

Is this truely a heartbreak? Was this what all these people talked about before me?

My heart hurts, my head is angry and sad. Both pulling me in different directions.

Did I really…..Did I really fall in love….Only for it to be ripped out of me when I finally realized it?

I don’t know what to do. This had never happened before and I have no idea what I’m feeling…

: ArmsofanAngel, Thank you so much for your comment. It really helped me