So I realized today that I don’t know very much about myself. I’ve always been a giving person. I live to help others. I put everyone else in front of myself. I don’t know why I do this. Perhaps it’s just my nature to imagine how it must feel to be someone else. Or to want to fix things for others. I’m just a victim of a bleeding heart. But when you do this, sometimes you forget who you are in the process. Instead you become someone’s prop, someone’s aide, a shadow in someone else’s life.

So I’m going to make it a mission to get to know myself. To learn the things that bring me joy and the things that make me cry. I went for a walk out in nature today and I felt alive. How noticing the water’s twinkling reflection on the tree trunks bending over the oozing river made me think. Or how walking through the straw fields made me wander. Or how staying home alone on a Saturday night feels like Christmas Eve—warm and safe.

Tomorrow will be day one of this process. I will make a list of ways to get to know myself—get involved in more activities, try new things, spend more time alone, spend more time in a nature, etc.