Dyanna L is addicted to cheer bombs

Help people to understand why I do not NEED a romantic relationship to have a happy and successful life, then show them that they can do the same AND that they should LOVE themselves NOT CHANGE themselves to satisfy the wants of another human being (read all 4 entries…)
Ok here's a question 16 months ago

So I go to visit my cousins out of town, just like I always do in the summer. This time though not just one cousin, one great aunt and a few toddlers were there, they had a brunch with they very large brood in attendance. Think like 30 people with mother father, kids, their kids and some i think even their kids. So they have a family rule that the kids can only sit at the big formal table if they are married.
So there were 4 of the unweds and me, I have nearly a decade on the nearly married couple who sat at the big formal table. And the same decade goes for the kids at the not married table. So, at what point do I get to sit at the formal table with the adults?
I mean really, my brunch conversation consitted of sly snickers about pot smoking days and last nights shooter escapades. I mean give me a break. I am an educated grown up, do I really need to sit with the barely legal children because I am unwed?
So I plan never to get married hook up or whatever. I wonder when I can graduate to the formal table sans husband. Or will I forever be cutting the chicken for my cousins babies?

Jun 24, 2008, 05:01PM PDT | 4 cheers


Comments:

pcyclepath is making progress :)

Couldn’t you tell in advance to the party organizer (your aunt perhaps) that you are going to sit with the other adults of similar age and it’s about time to change this rather silly rule?

Jun 26, 2008, 01:24AM PDT | Thread | Respond to this

Dyanna L is addicted to cheer bombs

If only it were so easy

No I couldn’‘t. It’s a very patriarchal family with the head, my great uncle still around and calling the shots. He would never go for an unwed gal sitting at th adults table. I mean, he’s been hosting dinners at that table for 60 years, he’s not about to change his rules now. Heaven forbid the modern world enter his home.

Jun 26, 2008, 08:57AM PDT | Thread | Respond to this

pcyclepath is making progress :)

Sorry didn’t realize the extend of the problem at first, how difficult it must be. I really admire you for putting so much effort to keep the relationship with your extended family going.

Jul 01, 2008, 12:48AM PDT | Respond to this

consequite gamboling

That is

completely outrageous. While I understand that you were at your uncle’s house, it’s still outrageous that you (and the other guests) were made to feel that you were only worthy of recognition as an adult if you were married. What an unjustifiable criterion for “grown up” inclusion.

Grr.

Jun 29, 2008, 07:46PM PDT | Respond to this

travelyogatrance

Nonsense

I’m sorry sister, but that is one ass backwards rule. THEY are the ones with the problem, not you. I’d either suck it up and have fun with the kiddies or stop going to family functions of this nature if they cannot treat you with respect as the adult that you are. No offense to your uncle, but his rule really is one of the dumbest things Ive ever heard in my life.

Im a happily independent woman myself and I wish you much joy as you continue to live a full, happy life free from an intimate romantic relationship~ :D

Jul 16, 2008, 05:24PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 1 cheer

Dyanna L is addicted to cheer bombs

I did have fun with kids

I just love toddlers and all that jazz…..but it doesn`t make the slight any softer..ya know

Nov 03, 2008, 04:47PM PST | Respond to this

(This comment was deleted.)

Sep 03, 2008, 11:02AM PDT

(This comment was deleted.)

Nov 03, 2008, 10:59AM PST

Dyanna L is addicted to cheer bombs

Ya'll were so responsive

I decided to post on this goal again…

You are all right and pretty much get the issue. For which I am glad, it makes me feel like less of a whiny brat, adds a little rationality to my argument. Why were the barely legal high school sweet hearts (engaged apperantly, how do I know, I don’t even know them) allowed to be elevated to the status of adult…it was a bit demeaning.

The important thing I should point out (now that the heat of the table issue is long gone LOL)  was afterwards when all the adults came into the kitchen first they were surprised I wasn't in the dining room, second they had no clue who I was and third 2 wives (married in) were a bit miffed that I was excluded and my loverly cousin whom I adore because she is so like no one in her family and like an aunt to me, was very apologetic that I got put in the kitchen and was pissed that mah great uncle let the barely legal teen couple in and not I....

Still hard to swallow and kinda not fair, that was an opportunity for me to know family I don`t have a chance to ever meet (they eat and run around there). Thinking about the coming holidays and all the crap that comes with it is what stirs this all up again…hence the new post to the goal…in a holiday spirit.

In any event, thanks for getting where I am coming from and thanks for the single support!

Nov 03, 2008, 04:47PM PST | Respond to this


Dyanna L has gotten 4 cheers on this entry.

 

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