Just to be sure that I was using the appropriate word I looked up the definition and it fits: “a place or state of oblivion to which persons or things are regarded as being relegated when cast aside, forgotten, past, or out of date”.

The fat lady hasn’t sung yet but, the train has already left. Well, James left Hawaii and with that action the relationship ended. He closed the chapter on Hawaii and moved on and I wish I could be as uncaring and thoughtless as him. I was even willing to visit him in FL to continue our relationship or at least to see where it would lead to but…I ended up cancelling my reservations.

And, it is hard to start dating again (I hate that word, what am I a teenager??) when my heart still loves James and hopes for “happily ever after”. I wish I could just forget about him and stop waiting for a phone call or an email that I know I will never get. I know I don’t want to get back on that rollercoaster ride again, but I keep thinking of the good times (even when there were so many more bad times) and then I get so sad. It is so depressing and pathetic to be holding on.