I kind of regretted not buying that actually. I just checked online bookstores, but it is much more expensive there. Maybe I should just go back for it! And must check out that other one too, thank you for the suggestions! :)

just one more thing I love about 43T, you can post just about any questions and get lots of great suggestions and answers! :) Must check that book out, definitely!

I’ve given away dozens of copies of Feeling Good.

I like it because it’s not about relentlessly positive, Pollyanna-ish thinking, but rather about learning to challenge the equally unrealistic negative thinking patterns: e.g., turning “I always screw up making a presentation” into “This last presentation, I was a bit stiff during the formal part, but I was more relaxed when answering questions afterward. Next time I might try not depending so heavily on my notes, so that I can make eye contact with the audience more.”

I use Burns’s principles frequently to counter my Inner Critic’s unhelpful messages.

Burns identifies ten problematic “cognitive distortions” common to people with low self-esteem and a high incidence of mood disorders. He then systematically shows readers how to counteract their own distorted, counterproductive thinking.

Again, this is not “positive thinking” so much as “effective thinking,” or perhaps “thinking for effectiveness.” By changing the way we think, Burns argues, we can often change the way we feel. These techniques have proven their power in helping lift depression (either in conjunction with medications or alone), but they also have many other practical uses — e.g., building self-esteem, overcoming procrastination, and handling criticism (from others or from our own demons).

A sequel, The Feeling Good Handbook, applies the same phenomenally useful procedures to these areas and to such other important goals as conquering anxiety (including social anxiety) and fears, improving communication, and giving “a dynamic job interview when you’re scared stiff.”

I can’t praise these books highly enough. Reading Burns can change (and even save) lives.

for the suggestion! That sounds like a great book, will head over to an online bookstore to have a look at it right now! :)

I tend to get caught up in focusing on the negative sometimes, like putting myself down for not meeting my workout goals for the week, rather than congratulating myself for actually working out once or twice for instance. Which isn`t good for motivation.
And I do have some serious difficulties in my life, mainly the problem of my dog not being able to be home alone. Which causes me to lie awake at night, panicing about the fact that I might lose one of my dogs, who I love more than anything, and panicing about the dogsitter problems and finances. If I could be more calm and focus on our tranining progress, who knows, maybe my dog would feel calmed too, and training would be easier. And I would feel better in the process, now it is just a constant state of panic.