since childhood i developed intricate system [i cant remember exact word] that help me appear “normal” e.g. i learned and usually managed to hide that i function totaly different than anybody else, something i allways knew. and something noone could understand. as you all know.

it is not that hard to trick almost everybody (and avoid the rest) since there is no public sensitivity to this issue.

i start to grow tired of all that pretending. it is not that it is difficult (it is!); it is not that i don’t know how long i’ll get away with it (i don’t!); it occured to me today that it simply has no sence. i want to be what i am.

i need career path, my niche, that uses my unique traits to my advantage instead of hiding them.