I hide so much from the world and sometimes there are so many things I want to say in a blog but can’t because I have readers who know me and will say things to me.

I am so lonely. I don’t know why. I have lots of casual acquaintances but I just don’t feel like I have any friends here. I sit and obsess, trying to figure out what kind of personality flaws I must have that keep driving people away from me. I just don’t see it.

All I do is study and I don’t even like what I am doing. Truth is, I don’t really want to do anything… at all. Or I guess anything that resembles work.

I just feel like am at a low point and I need to turn it back around because I hate feeling like this.

No one understands me.
No one wants me.

I just know I am going to end up becoming the antithesis of what I want to be. I am going to get the antithesis of what I desire in life.

You don’t have to respond to this… I just needed to get this out of my system and down in words because I can’t let it keep floating around in my head anymore.