ha, I need to change this to ‘stop going back to this loser’. Third try… is not a charm… Why am I sooooo addicted to him? He treats me like I’m just a friend in public, not at all affectionate, I think he loves me but I don’t know that he’s in love with me, but I really do love him. You’d think I would’ve learned by now that every time I give him my heart he’s going to hand it back in pieces. I don’t think he knows how to do it any other way. He even tried to talk me out of it. He said he would inevitably hurt me, he cared about me and that’s why it would be better for me to move on and forget him, because he didn’t want to hurt me and it killed him to think that he could and probably would. But I told him, stupidly, that I didn’t care if I got hurt again, that I loved him and he was worth the risk… Now I don’t know. I’m remembering everything I didn’t like about the last two times with him. Things already happening again, and it’s only three days into this go around of the relationship. Ugh.. why can’t he just be the good guy I know he’s capable of being all the time? why does the side of him that’s a complete jerk have to show up at all?