I was having a bad day :(

Thanks for the hugs :)

I think the amazing outpouring of support from everyone here on 43 is so sincere, and so wonderful, that it’s really helped me feel…how shall I say?

Not so much like someone without a family.

I’ve only got the hubby and the pooch, and that’s it. An Aunt I email in Buenos Aires, and a cousin I see every 10 years whenever I’m in Zurich…that’s it.

you guys are so much my family and I do appreciate all the kind words.

I know this is hard to hear, and I’m sorry if I get whiney and self-pitying at times…I guess I unload it on the internet so as not to walk around with it on, weighing me down.

Between the blog and 43, It’s like wiping the poopy bits off my shoes so I can have a clean house, if you’ll pardon the metaphor.

having cancer is a lot like stepping in dog poop, I guess. You never really ever feel that those shoes are ever really ‘clean’ ever again, do you? Sheesh.

I think I was having a bad day, couldn’t swallow anything without a lot of pain in the esophagus/stomach and I’m usually of the “cast iron stomach” sort, so this delicate wah-poor me shit was too much for me to take. it was a sucky day, and I just had to say so.

I love ya, Unc.
I do.
:)

I’ve never had them, but I imagine it’s like a gigantic gnocchi, which sound pretty darned good.

Actually, the drugs they gave me for anti-nausea work pretty well, I was only on them for about 4 days post chemo, and I never got sick.

My biggest issue is now some sort of delicacy in the esophagus (makes sense, it’s killing off all rapidly deviding cells, and the GI tract is all that) and so it’s painful to eat bread, crackers, swallow tea…anything.

I’m feeling much better now, even normal I’d say, and I haven’t shed much hair yet (so, I’m holding out that I have a slight chance of keeping it like my mom did, but if not, c’est la vie)

It could always be a lot worse, I keep telling my husband, when he gets all sad. Hey, they didn’t tell me “I’m sorry, there’s nothing we can do for you”

I’m relatively blessed.

Thanks Tiisi, for the suggestions and the comment…ginger tea is great! and Altoids are doing a good job too :)

I am hoping it goes like that for me, which is better than I was anticipating…yucky for the first few days, then the worst being about 4-6 days out.

They told me it would be around `0-14 days, as far as fatigue, hair falling out, etc, but I’m at that now and I feel much better than I had hoped. I still have to be very careful with foods, and mouthcare, but besides that, I’m doing ok.

Thanks for the continued support :)
(((Mahinui)))