which seems important to me:

And if you hear the words “why don’t you trust me”, you have to realize that what you are really hearing is “I don’t trust you”. Whatever is going on may well put your relationship in jeopardy and they are (may be) afraid of loosing you. Time to put on your fire retardant long johns; and brace yourself for something you don’t really want to hear. That means it is most important to be calm, listen, ask questions – not accusations.

....

Yea, deleted that last part – a little over the top.