This was my do-or-else goal, and I failed. Enormously (haha). I actually gained weight – about 8 lbs. And I usually don’t put on weight quickly. But food has been my friend (like Liz Lemon’s “I don’t know, let me ask food.” brand of emotional eating. Only not as sad and lonely. I’ve been doing a lot of indecisive thinking and a lot of happy eating – I need to be more decisive and miserable, apparently, to be skinny).

Anyway, I’m going to give myself until after Xmas, and then I’m going to go back to being a vegetarian, for a start. I liked being a vegetarian, so that isn’t actually a punishment for my failure as much as a strategy that I know will work. And if I don’t see results quickly, I’ll start drastically cutting calories (though I don’t respond well to that – I eat little all day and then binge at night.)

Ah, dammit. We’ll see.