firstly i’d like to say thank you for getting in touch,my desire to understand this subject is genuine,i lost someone emotionally and intellectually who was very dear to me and i recognise that this was in no small part due to my obdurate insistence on a stereotypical response to the issue which alienated this person to the extent that she sought the support she needed elsewhere ending our relationship.
however i still hold to the view that these sites whatever the initial motivation do more harm than good,as a libertarian this causes me a desperate conflict but a worthwhile one.
if i felt pro ana/mia sites offered support i’d sign up to help them get thier message across but it is not about support,it’s about enabling and that is a whole differant ball game.
i have yet to come across a bulimic who is happy with thier lot,mostly the most desperate desire is to break the cycle that ruins health and self esteem and thereby alienates them from others.
i agree that as with all conditions people with no knowledge are not best placed to comment on issues but please do not assume you must have the condition to have knowledge of it.
i watched a bright intelligent outgoing pretty young woman become a desperate decietful paranoid abuser in thrall to a condition that was destroying her from the inside and in spite of all i or others did she remained on the path.
as i alluded earlier my responses where stereotypical,youmust eat,you can’t excersise four times a day,drinking three bottles of wine a day is not good for you etc etc,but i now take a more considered view.
please get in touch again if you want to,the key with issues like this is dialogue without histrionics which i admit may have driven my initial posting.
go well in your world

thanks for your post,it is of inestimable value to those of us who have been involved with ana/mia ,as the ex partner of someone has been through it i now know that many of my reactions were sterotypical and unhelpful but given the paucity of a&g back then(the mid 90’s)perhaps not suprising.
going forward wghat i hope for is a sustained informed debate between sufferers,carers and most importantly the wider public so that better understanding can at least lead to better help and a recognition of how much pain this condition has in it’s wake.
hope all is well with you,best wishes for 2010!