We see people of different religions give up things in order to grow in their faith. What comes to mind is fasting, or giving up food, and the Catholic tradition of Lent, giving up something of importance to demonstrate faith. Although I haven’t been a participant in these types of practices, there is something valid to be learned in regard to these customs.

The act of giving up something of importance for someone you love can lead to a greater self-discovery and help a relationship to take a giant leap in terms of growth. In our self-absorbed society, we often hear advice to the contrary…advice telling us to do what we want and have what we want without regard to anyone else.

And yes, it does make sense to be true to ourselves and go out and take what we really want in this world while we are here. But, there are relationships that are so important in our lives, that it is a privilege to give something up for the relationship.

If the relationship is fairly healthy, the result can be a deeper gratitude and trust between two people. The result of this unselfish act also may prompt a release of fear in the relationship and result in an opening up with true feelings and an increase of honesty between two people.

When we give up something important to us for the sake of someone else, we are letting the other person know that he or she is more important than the other thing is to us. That may be the only thing the other person really needed to know in the first place. And, when the person realizes that, then suddenly, that thing that was so important in the past, doesn’t matter so much anymore, to both of you.

And it may surprise you in the future to find yourself pursuing that which you gave up once again, only with a new, healthier perspective; and find it is a pursuit that the person you love appreciates too!

This is something that has taken me a long time to figure out.