I played rec soccer for many years, and I wasn’t ever very good. I played defense because the coach didn’t know where else to put me.

At the end-of-season awards ceremony, I’d always get “Most Improved.” I always wanted “Best” Something, but other players got those.

I also played basketball for a couple years, and I wasn’t any good at that either. One day at practice, we were doing drills where we had to run from one end of the court to the other. I was running past Jordan (same guy who got stung by bees) and he said “Your eyebrows are crooked”. Jordan had a broken arm, which was in a plaster cast.

When my dad picked me up from practice I told him what Jordan said to me. He said “Your eyebrows are fine. Jordan’s probably crooked because that cast is pulling one half of his body down.”

My eyebrows really are crooked.