an entry here. Can I finish it before I have to get off the train??!

Almost four months into 2009 and… Life is still spinning. Living situation has finally settled down and that is providing me with a massive source of stability while everything is spinning on its head. I am in the crux of a steep and intense relationship learning-curve – we seem to wake up every day in different trajectories in relation to each other, but there is a lotta love keeping us in orbit. My job is changing massively – and even if I stay, my position there will be very different by the end of the year. I am still creating, mostly musically as that’s the nearest thing to hand. I am surrounded by great friends even though I constantly feel deprived of enough quality time to do them justice. And Saturday is going to be a major event that I have been waiting for my whole life and may very well change its entire course. I am clinging to spontaneity and routine with equal force as I’m too overwhelmed to be fully in control and too inspired to be paralysed. I am doing what I can when I can and not expecting all of it to be perfect. It’s mental – gravity keeps shifting and I am doing what I can to stay upright, but falling over a bit and having a good roll on the wonky floor sometimes. That’s where I’m at, at some point I will have to call a halt and get a grip but definitely NOT right now.