strobefire

stop being so sad (read all 5 entries…)
In one of those moods 3 months ago

I’m in one of these moods again. I just want to live passionately, I feel like I have so much energy inside, but no where for it to go. I think it’s because I’m so isolated, I have this crap job and I live a lonely life.

I’ve tried penpals, I know it’s not a substitute for real people, but I’m not really in a place where I can meet people easily. And sometimes I think the penpals are working, and sometimes…it’s not. I always feel like I’m the one pursuing, I know I just need to be myself, but it happens quite a bit, and I feel like…what do people want in me? I’m trying so hard, it’s just that life is so difficult.

Sep 13, 06:35PM PDT | 2 cheers


Comments:

exercisedaily

Don't worry

you’ll get there soon enough. Sometimes these things seem to take forever.

I feel exactly the same some days too- so you’re so not alone in the ‘how you feel’ realm.

It’s double hard when you meet people and they’re in their ‘click…’ Some (lots of) people are “content” with the way they are and with the friends they have; they don’t want to really make an effort and branch out of their comfort zone. Who would want to be friends with those types anyway?

Just from reading your entries here and there, I can tell that you’re a lovely person who has a lot to offer.

Maybe it’s time to pack up and change your environment entirely. New suburb/town, new scenery, new job, new people who are waiting for you to bring something special into their lives. Don’t you give up.

Sep 13, 11:23PM PDT | Respond to this

strobefire

Thanks, I’m trying to stay upbeat!

Yes, I’ve noticed that too, a lot of people just aren’t open to having more friends, strange as it seems. Over the past year, my main strategy has just been to not think about being depressed and for the most part, it’s worked, but sometimes it just comes back and sucks you back in.

Right now, I’m just trying to focus on the positive. But thank you, you’re right, I can’t give up.

Sep 15, 06:55PM PDT | Thread | Respond to this 1 cheer

exercisedaily

Interesting- I’ve used that strategy for about 5 months now, it’s fine most of the time but occasionally I can feel relapse approaching- which for me can be set off by anything- and that scares me so much. Even thinking about it scares me.

You know, I must confess I do feel a slight hypocritical. It’s so easy to give other people advise and to encourage them etc. but when it comes to you’re own life- well thats another story- sometimes trying to stay positive isn’t realistic at certain times/when you’re feeling a certain way. Out of all your entries that I’ve read, I can truly say that 90% of them, I’ve thought and felt those exact things you’ve written about.

The other day someone told me to get over something- I thought afterwards- I could get over it, it wasn’t a life/death situation, and no one else thought it mattered, but on the other hand, they way i felt was the way i felt. Trying to manipulate my thinking and feelings to fit into how everyone else at the time thought and felt…well that’s not really right- to myself.

I guess my point here is that its okay to be depressed. It’s not you Vs the world, it’s you Vs you. Everyday gone is a day closer to what you want.

Sep 17, 05:12AM PDT | Thread | Respond to this

strobefire

You bring up an interesting point. Definitely one of the downsides to not thinking about sadness is that it can catch you unaware and unprepared. I’ve been in that situation too, somebody brings something up and I would just start crying my eyes out.

But for me, I don’t think there’s another way. What if you don’t really have someone to talk to when you’re feeling depressed? What can you do? It’s like the more you think about it, the sadder you get and there’s no good that can come from going down that road. But if you have a good support system, then it’s a lot easier.

It’s more complex than that though, I usually feel more ready to confront sadness when somebody dies or passes away. When that’s happened, people told me, ‘oh, I didn’t think you knew that person that well’ or ‘oh, just let time pass, you’ll get over it.’ I just wanted people to say that it was ok to cry, to feel sad.

Sep 20, 06:49PM PDT | Respond to this

fourpointo done with finals!

mood swings

atleast once a week..i’m in one of those moods …such as sad or depressed. I don’t know why tht happens.. It feels like there is smt missing in life tht i can’t seem to pin-point. i too feel lonely and sometimes it feels like loneliness will kill me. i don’t have many friends and yeah nothing seems to work when u are lonely. sometimes i feel so sick of this same same monotonous life… go to school and study! i feel sick of studying!!!!!!!!! i feel like i’ve nothing and i just want everything to end. smt i contemplate suicide saying to myself there is nothing tht i want to live for… I don’t know why i still keep living/ breathing. Life is too painful and lonely. don’t u agree?

Nov 09, 11:04PM PST | Thread | Respond to this

strobefire

Yes, it’s tough. I think all we can do is focus on the positive things in life, even if that’s just one thing and one day at a time.

I think you’ve done some great things and you’ve got some really good goals, so stay positive and believe in hope, we’re all capable of doing great things, sometimes we just need the opportunity.

Nov 16, 06:11PM PST | Respond to this


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