by chad kultgen

I judged a book by its cover yesterday and bought it at the big sale at Daedalus. It had a giant sticker on the front about a sexual content warning, but I had already assumed as much, judging by the title. I really liked the black and white design of the cover but did NOT like the blurbs on the back by apparent screennames?! Yet another blurb boasted it was “the book that sparked a youtube frenzy.” But the design was good, the first line-glance was good so I gulped and did it.

I read it all last night, not because it was good but because it was a quick, very very quick read. I can see women being more offended by this novel than anything Bukowski could ever do (and I often get reamed for having every Buk novel on my shelf when gals peruse my library), but I like to take things in stride. Men are really like this, yes, they generally think about and want sex every second of every day. Not all of them, of course, but the average. When they’re not playing video games, but even sometimes when they’re playing video games. I did have a slight issue with how he portrayed gay men in the novel, but there was also some truth to it.

Basic plot. Unnamed narrator (I bet the author really liked Fight Club!) is with girlfriend of one year Casey until someone better comes along, feeling nothing and actually somewhat disliking her as he fantasizes about sexing up literally every woman that comes across his path. On a flight back to LA after visiting parents for xmas, something better does: she’s a smaller-assed, pertier-breasted and younger woman named Alyna. After a rushed phone call setting up a date with this other woman, Casey tricks narrator into getting engaged (seriously) and then she resorts to more trickery to stay that way. Eventually, things become a mess and poor little unemotional fratastic narrator has to Deal With It. I enjoyed the commentary on how most men really think and reluctantly agree with his assessment of how most women are—even the ones you fall for because “they’re not like everyone else” turn out to be just like the others in the end. You both end up bored, disinterested, making excuses….

“It will never be like it was. It will never be better than this.”