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Kimber~ (>‿♥)

stay positive (read all 10 entries…)
working towards the positive...

i had a therapy session last week…& my therapist raised the question of going back to work! she thinks that i’ve made leaps & bounds in alot of areas. she’s always been very supportive & encouraging in areas of improvement. she worries that i’m avoiding the work thing entirely…& she’s right. i am enjoying this time off & this self discovery phase in my life…it’s been a very nurturing soulful experience for me that was long over due. i do fear going back to work & facing the everyday pressures & stress that a job brings to the table. i haven’t really even made an effort to apply for any jobs in my field. i had an interview at the beginning of the year & the gentleman that interviewed was encouraging but thought i was way too over qualified for what he was offering. he came right out & said you could do this job & plus mine…my reply was that i was trying to simplify things.

in the past i’ve been very career oriented & do my work with a 110% attitude with grace & care…i’ve gotten a couple of referrals from past clients for potential positions but i ignored the calls or made excuses that i wasn’t ready yet…i think i’m in fear that the work thing will take over my life again & all what i’ve learnt will fall away from me again. i have such a reputation of being a superstar & going for the gold with passion…well i’m tired & maybe feeling a bit lost in translation…

i fear i won’t have balance & my career will rob me of myself…these are fears that have been dwelling & tapping at me just below the surface. i’ve been avoiding them selfishly… almost every boss i’ve had puts me on this pedestal…i fall for the compliments & praise resulting with me never saying no to anything they ask of me. resulting with long days & leaving no time for a personal life with me lying to myself that i’m working towards something worth while.

once i was given task to find a gift for a very high profile client in our new york office. i was given a budget of $3000.00 to find something that represented the canadian rockies. i approached an local artist & explained a vision of what i thought might be unique…the result was an amazing painting of three different mountains post card style with each mountian having it’s own frame on one canvas. it really was very beautiful. i persuaded her to insert a personal message to our client to make it even more unique. the client loved the artful piece & it still sits proudly in his new york office. my boss was so impressed with the gift that i immediately recieved a raise & a promotion which ment more work…& even longer days.

so the work thing i know…maybe too well. i have to face some realites of not always trying to be a superstar & pleasing everyone & everything around me especially in the work environment. i don’t want to sit cowardly in a corner either because i know from past experiences i’ve received great joys from my efforts at work. i just need & yearn for a balance with work & play. so slowly i will work on gently moving forward with finding a position that suits my current needs & passions while not forgetting about myself. facing some of those fears that have been stirring wildly deep inside me. i’ll will do my best to step out of my comfort zone even if it’s briefly. working towards the positive even if it scares me to the core. to muster the courage & steps for balance in rest of my life…



Comments:

happygrandma is back with a vengenance!

You sound like

you are becoming so balanced. It’s something I am seeking in my own life. Over achievers always work too hard.

Kimber~ (>‿♥)

thank you!!

for your kind words…we’ll see if the balance sticks when i’m back in the work force…good luck with your efforts…:))

Saraband savouring the simple things

I can totally totally

relate to what you’re saying here :)

Except that I’m choosing to interpret my fear of returning to work as meaning that stepping back into that cycle is no longer something I want to do.

You’ve taken such great strides over the months that I’ve been watching your journey and I am filled with admiration for your courage and honesty. I know you will find the right path for the next phase of your journey – gently and when the time is right :)

and you get my 3000th cheer to help you along the way ;)

theba2il Great Spirit, let me plant positive seeds.

Comment

Sweet and encouraging comment:o) Kudos for the 3000th cheer!

Kimber~ (>‿♥)

(((sara)))

thanks so much for your very thoughtful comments. i really appreciated your kind encouraging words…;)) i’m not even sure if i want to do the same thing as i was doing before. it absorbs so much of my time. i’m thinking of other options…which is scary on so many levels…i need something that fuels me…a pure passionate purpose. i’m honored that i was your 3000th cheer..thanks…your awesome..;)k

Saraband savouring the simple things

lol

you are even more honoured now! I’m giving you my 3000th cheer TWICE!!!! How amazing is that! I bet there aren’t many people who can claim to be the recipient or the giver of TWO 3000th cheers! If you follow what I’m saying – which is unlikely if I’m honest :D

I’ve explained this more clearly in another entry called ‘ahem’

:-P

I’ll be back to this thread properly later – but getting that cheer in the right place was very important so needed to be done straight away :D

theba2il Great Spirit, let me plant positive seeds.

Quote

“Many of us crucify ourselves between two thieves – regret for the past and fear of the future.”~Fulton Oursler

I can relate to your entry. Best wishes on returning back to work. You are in my thoughts. XO

Kimber~ (>‿♥)

great quote!

thanks for sharing & for your lovely words of encouragement…;))

theba2il Great Spirit, let me plant positive seeds.

You're welcome

Ah, but I must thank you for sharing:o) Sometimes it is personal. But it is good to share so other people get the help they need. For example, therapy. I’ve been to therapy several times. In the beginning, I was ashamed that I needed help and medication. “That’s not normal.” It was the best thing I ever did! I learned why I did the things I did and from there how to change most of those behaviors. And I’m still working on a couple…

Kimber~ (>‿♥)

yes...i agree

it took me a long time to come to terms with being in therapy..& letting go of that shame. understanding, learning from struggles & behaviors…what leads us to those healing moments of truth….just this past year i finally admitted to some of my closest friends that i was in therapy. i was in such fear that they would judge me or think ill of me..but that was so far from the truth…i am so grateful for their support…thanks again for sharing your thoughts…;))

theba2il Great Spirit, let me plant positive seeds.

Sharing

My pleasure, anytime.

Taz 2014 is a year of doing

Being able

to recognise how much you have achieved will help you step out and find that new niche and you have come so far, you should be so very proud of yourself. You are my superstar!

Kimber~ (>‿♥)

awe thanks ((taz))

you always know how to bring me to smiles…your such a rockstar..;o) xxx


Kimber~ has gotten 20 cheers on this entry.

 

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