So far no progress. Last night, we went to Latona Pub. I was full after I ate half the (huge) sandwich and half the (kinda gross) tomato soup. I thought, excellent! Now I can stop myself!

And then I was like, but what about all this food? I can’t just leave it here. Maybe I’ll just eat less for breakfast tomorrow. I can’t box up the food either, we’re walking home and how am I going to carry this soup without spilling it? Ugh.

So I ate it all, even though I didn’t even LIKE it, didn’t actually WANT to eat it, and was full! Ugh. And then I looked over at my friend, down the table, who ordered the same thing, and found she had stopped at the same point as me, but didn’t finish her food, nor take it away. See, this is why she is skinny and I am a fat pig.

Anyway, so tonight, my boyfriend and I go to a fancy restaurant—and again, I eat too much! I know I am full, but I still keep going, because I hate the thought of having to carry leftovers, and I hate the thought of rewarming those leftovers to eat later, and I also hate the thought of the food just going to waste. Thus…two nights in a row, I eat too much!

I don’t know how I’m going to tackle this goal. I am told that Dolly Parton, when she lost all that weight in the 80s, handled restaurants by thinking like this—there are two guardian angels sitting on her shoulder, and she has to remember to save them enough food for them to eat.

That is so totally not going to work for me. I’d think to myself—I’m wasting it! Then I’d think, I’ll carry it home for them in a container. Then I’ll think, jeez, Sandra, the angels are fake, you don’t need to carry anything home, don’t be a dork. And then I’ll end up eating it all.

WHAT CAN I DO? ! ? ! ? ! ? ! Aurgh.