I used to be a serial long-term relationship girl, but I haven’t been in a relationship for a good year and a half. A few (really hurtful) false starts, but nothing that stuck.

I ended the last good relationship I was in back in 2008. I ended it because I was young and stupid and took everything for granted. If I could go back, I would have shaken some sense into myself. Sometimes I don’t feel like I deserve to find a good relationship because I ruined my chances with the person who may have been my soulmate. Meanwhile, he’s in a relationship, and life isn’t a romcom – he’s not going to magically leave her for me if I pop back into his life after nearly 3 years.

I’m starting to feel like I have a better chance at mastering multivariable calculus than finding love (and advanced math is not my strong suit). Whenever I check Facebook, all I see are wedding photos and engagement announcements – and while I’m happy for my Facebook friends and love seeing their photos, it is a painful reminder that I missed the boat.

Step one: believing it’s possible. Here goes nothing.