Over the past few years, my anxiety has slowly been shoving it’s way into everything: My diet, my social interactions. Really everything. Last April I hit a low point of sorts. I would wake up in a panic. Going to sleep was really tough. Not sure why, but the dark just seemed to make it worse. Soon I was literally dreading sun down like I was in some horrible monster movie. This is part of where the anxiety pops in. I spent most of the day worrying about being afraid. It really was ridiculous. Cutting out sugar helped with the panic attacks to a degree, but even still I get anxious about being anxious.
I worry about such stupid things, and I KNOW how dumb it is, but I can’t help it. The biggest thing is food. I literally have stopped eating so many things because I’m worried I’m going to get sick. Then if I do get sick, I worry that the pills are going to make me feel gross or some weird side effect is going to eat my soul. Even aspirin and vitamins are a no go. I guess in a way it all comes down to feeling off. I’ve felt so mediocre for so long, that even the thought of feeling better then normal scares me.