I don’t know how often you need to be on the site to be considered a “heavy” user, but I suspect I’m in the category. Probably anyone who comes on more than a couple times a week?

Here’s my take:

Privacy here: if I post something to Facebook, I have control over who sees the link or the posting, and I know who is on my friends’ lists as real people. Here, on 43t, I have 59 anonymous subscribers, all operating under pseudonyms even if their on-line identities were revealed to me. They could be major donors to my agency; my husband; my brother – who knows who is lurking here.

And then, anything I write can be shared with anyone else anyway. All the crazy shit I’ve confessed here – anyone could post it to Facebook for hahas if they were so inclined. Hasn’t happened as far as I know, but it certainly could.

And in fact, I’ve written stuff up here – just bicycle ride reports I believe – and linked to it from other sites, because it is indeed so accessible. You don’t need an account to read it, the advertisements are low-key – it’s a good place to post stuff for others to access.

In any case, the addition of the “share” buttons didn’t seem like such a big deal to me. Everything is always shareable anyway. I use the Google Toolbar, and there’s a big Share button right above this window right now. Sixty-one sites, from Blogger to Yigg are offered up as places I could repost anything here.

Clearly, though, people took it as a huge change – a sort of change of philosophy, and a betrayal of trust.

I don’t know what to say about this. It was easy for me to take the pledge not to repost what people have written here. In my nearly five years on this site, I’ve never been tempted to repost anything except what is my own. I’m only upset because it appears so many others who perceive themselves as a part of this community are so upset. Apparently people have deleted, left – I feel bad that they have gone.

I really appreciate that you are open to reflecting on this. I hope you are sincere about that. I get the sense that you are.

One thing I’ve noticed is that the comments against this are coming from users I know and users I’ve never seen before. (Having been a regular for 4 years, I recognize a lot of names!) Even among the users I know, there are several I am surprised to see speaking up, because they are so unflappable (Stu, The_Breyfart,etc.) and tend to keep a bit more to themselves rather than join group causes. That, in my mind, is significant.

Thanks again, Joe. It’s been sad to see so many users delete, and others who feel compelled to redact their posts so that they are less personal and genuine. I’m glad to know that you are giving real thought to what makes the site valuable to members and to what their concerns are.

your front page has been littered with people absolutely outraged about this for 3 days now, and little else. If there are other heavy users out there, I’d love to see them posting…

It’s good to know you’re willing to figure out what makes us tick. One of the things that upset me was the apparent “get over it, like it or not” attitude that seemed to come across in the robots’ second blog post, in spite of the outcry, so I for one really appreciate that you’re giving it some thought.

One of the many things that attracts people to this site is that it’s not Facebook or Twitter – it’s deeper, more meaningful and much more supportive. I suspect you’ll find your “heavy users” are exactly the people who are least fond of the huge shallow networking sites.

part of the beauty of 43T was in its independence from the mainstream, shallow SNSs. People come here to do more than just hang out, they come here to build dreams, change their lives – it’s not often that you see people do that on Facebook, and I doubt you can do it in 140 characters either ;) I use both the other sites, but I’d rather be here, and here in its own right, not as a filter to the other giants. You have built something truly amazing and unique here – why make it a funnel to give even more material to FB and Twitter? Maybe one day they’ll all have “cheer this on 43T” buttons – who knows.

this “Are the 100 anti-facebook people” is far from the core of what many protesters here have in mind. It has got nothing to do with “anti-facebook”.
But it has to do with the wish not to be exposed to a public – that is, the facebook-public- because the goal-setting and the support and and and have reached a certain degree of intimacy that I wouldn’t like people to share who I have kept apart from those thoughts and statements.
I communicate different things with different people here and there. And I don’t feel that those different spheres should get into touch without my explicit consent.

I don’t share anything secret on the net, and I am kind of an open book anyway, so it doesn’t bother me personally.

I don’t have a “protest” goal because I don’t like having too many meta goals. However, I still feel it was badly handled. The users should have had a couple of weeks’ advance notice to scrub their goals and posts, if they wished.

I am curious: what’s the goal in linking to FB and Twitter? I am guessing it is to create more visibility to 43T, therefore raising the number of users, therefore being able to charge more for Google ads. Is this correct? I don’t object to your trying to make 43T profitable, of course. I want you guys to be profitable so that you keep running!

This is soooo different from any other online community I have come across – people feel (relatively) comfortable to share their hopes and fears, and innermost thoughts that they would not even share to friends and family, and even more – the community on here supports, advises, listens and is just here for them 24/7. It’s not just about helping and sharing goals, is about helping and sharing life.

I know all the content can be shared, but it used to take time and effort, not a mere click of a button, and was something most people would not even have thought of doing…at least not before those buttons appeared. I have known people to post very very personal things with a subscript that they will delete the post in 24 hours, but they felt a real need to share something with their cohort of subscribers, and would risk it in the public domain to feel supported by their 43T friends. With an easy share click button this would be way too risky.

Putting the buttons there actually invites sharing of these deep and personal posts – when previously this felt like a secret corner with like minded people who would share your joys and help you through very difficult times..

I believe the community here is very very special, it attracts a certain sort of person that I can’t seem to find anywhere else, either online or in real life. I have made some very special friends here, some of whom I have now met, but many I know I am unlikely to ever meet – the world is a big place – but I am hoping one day that I might.

If it does all change to be just yet another SNS then it will hold nothing special for me, and I do not see any benefit to me in continuing to be here. I’ll just be grateful for the precious years I did have here, and hope to keep in contact with the very very precious people I have had the privilege to ‘meet’, from all corners of the world.

Please, please reconsider – if the buttons must remain please let there be an opt-out facility on the sharing aspect.

And thanks for taking the time to understand us.

it’s currently 145 of your users, not 100, under this goal

Oh, and in order for my little cluck of protest to be heard where should I send that message of objection to? Please do advice.

that you are thinking about this makes me feel less hostile.

After reading The Robot blog about sharing, I felt like our concerns were falling on deaf ears.

I love 43T. Thanks for your consideration.

while I am sure there are some anti-facebook people among us, I would guess that much of the anti-facebook group is more of the “don’t put all my entries, comments and cellulite on facebook for everyone to see” variety

I don’t want facebook linked with 43things.

when I first joined 43things, it was because I liked the idea of having a list of goals. I think I had goals like “sleep under the stars” and “swim with dolphins”. If that was still 43T to me, then I wouldn’t mind if it was linked to facebook.

But then I discovered the community behind it, the people on 43. This is what made me stay! People on 43 are not the average person. In general I can say 43Ters are intelligent and openminded and funny and supportive and caring. because of the kind of people who find 43things on their own, and because it’s not so out in the open (cos it wasn’t linked to facebook) people were able to share on a much deeper level.

43 is not widely known among internet users. but I like that. it takes the previous mentioned kind of person to find 43things! and this has created a special community, where we share very personal things and where we bond and I don’t want that to go!.

If 43 is linked with facebook, the average internet user will destroy the community we’ve created. 43T will be all about “swimming with dolphins” and “sleeping under the stars” again. users will come and go. yes, there will be more users. yes that seems to mean more profit. but they won’t stick around. many people either have already left or are considering leaving. and the new kind of user will also leave, because they’ll be bored of list-making. Maybe they won’t leave, but they certainly won’t be visiting the site so frequently as many do now. It’s the community that makes people stay and come here on a daily basis, so I honestly think that on the long run, this is going to cost you.

but mostly it’ll cost us, current users. I don’t want random people on facebook to turn 43T into another random, shallow website.
It’s not that I don’t want new people to find out about 43things. But not through facebook. They should find out about 43 by themselves, by googling things like ’”get rid of my depression”. That’s what it takes to create and keep this community.

Please keep the community aspect of the site, that is what keeps it rolling. So PLEASE listen to us, we speak up because we care. Please get rid of the share buttons. Stop telling facebook about this amazing website!

It’s good to know that someone listens!
Hopefully the rest of the team is feeling the same way.

Now, ironically enough, I did find this post of yours, Joe, in a link. Before going under fire, I’m not against links. I just think that our stuff on 43things shouldn’t be encouraged to be shared outside of 43 things.

I use Facebook. I use it to keep in touch with old friends. At large, I find it very superficial and would probably get rid of it all together if I weren’t so awful at keeping in touch with the few people I actually do want to stay in contact with from my past.

I use 43 things for an entirely different reason. I loved the site because it seemed like a genuinely supportive community.

I use it to try to encourage myself, keep myself motivated to become a better person, and to try to encourage others as I can.

I don’t post anything that I believe would hurt anyone around me if they read it. I’m not ashamed of anything I’ve written here.

So, what exactly is the problem I have with the changes?

This is a site that has a very involved community. We deserve to at least know about, if not have some input in, any major changes, especially those that could lead to us feeling our privacy has been violated.

The web is a beautiful thing. You can create an illusion of anonymity, or create an entirely new identity for yourself. You can reveal as much or as little about yourself as you wish. That’s an individual choice, however.

For 43things to encourage its users to share other users posts, lists, and thoughts on third-party sites, superficial ones like Facebook and twitter, well… that really changes the atmosphere here.

And mostly, I took offence to how quick the Robots were to be condescending and rude to people who were protesting the addition, telling us to be more prudent in the things we say here. The last paragraphs of that blog post sickened me. Apologies should come first, and not following that sort of comment. Talk about adding insult to injury.

Also… we aren’t just a vocal minority
We are the people who visit this site often, daily, even. That’s why over 100 of us were able to join this group so quickly. I’m sure it isn’t often that a new goal manages to have so many people adding it to their lists in such short time. Many of us are truly upset, and I’m sure most of us aren’t so unreasonable to refuse compromise, an approval process for others sharing us, or added privacy features. We’re here because we like 43things and want to continue using it, assuming it keeps the right direction.

I’m not on Facebook because I don’t care for a lot of my past friends to look me up, Make or approve friend requests.
Here, I can be friends without the hassle of doing that. I have a certain degree of anonymity. I don’t have to register with my personal information.
And I would like some very personal entries I’ve made here to remain here.