raincheck been off 43T for 6+ months - bad bad girl! :o)

Allow myself to only be treated well by the people I choose to have friendships and relationships with. If they do not, I need to find the courage to move on without them. (read all 23 entries…)
Goodbye G - I love you so much, but I love me more

This is the end. The ultimate goodbye to the best relationship I’ve ever had.
I sent him a text message saying it was the end. He did not even reply.
I blocked his number on my mobile – just in case he should call again.

He has always been self-destructive. No wonder he had no trouble in destroying our relationship, even though he’s lost as much as I did, if not more.

Goodbye G. Are you happy now???
I don’t think so. You only feel temporarily good because you’re flattered by my pain and desperation. It won’t last, and you’ll be left with emptiness and regret.

Congrats: now you have one more reason to get stoned on weed and alchool.



ispeakforpeace is making my own way.

Good for you, blocking his number! I wish I had the strength (or common sense) to do that…I keep deleting my ex’s number from my phone, but then it gets put back later…I wish he’d change his number, I remember it all to well…I hope you continue to be strong and confident!

raincheck been off 43T for 6+ months - bad bad girl! :o)

4 months later...

I’m still struggling to end this relationship.
Soon after I wrote the entry above, he came back and we got back together. It was a disaster which lasted for 4 more months.

Now I’m not doing too well. I keep sending him insulting messages on the phone and that is no good: it diminishes myself, and makes me angrier and even more bitter. I’m better than that. And even though he has repeatedly cheated on me and lied to me, my aggressive behaviour is not justifiable and does no good whatsoever.

So I hope I’ll stop. I hope the text message I sent him a couple of hours ago will actually be the last one EVER.

seeking~serenity WOW!!! GOOD THINGS ARE HAPPENING. FAST!!! :)

I'm sorry to hear

that you’re still struggling with this relationship. I read the above entry from July, and it’s like I wrote it about the guy I just broke up with-in a text as well…also with no response from him. Heck, even add in the pot. Are we speaking of the same person?! Jk.

All joking aside. Based on what you wrote on Nov 22 about how you’re acting, it really doesn’t sound healthy. I completely understand your aggressive behavior towards him, but the fact that he makes you become someone you’re not, and someone you don’t like and probably don’t have much control over is a big red flag! And, nobody deserves to be continually lied to and cheating on!

You DO deserve SOOOOOO much better!!!

I hope you have gained the strength to end what you know isn’t good for you within the time since your comment above. I hope that text WAS the last one ever!

There is someone wonderful out there who is going to appreciate, respect, and love you the way you should be appreciated, respected, and loved.

Like the beginning of your entry reads: Love yourself more! Best wishes to you.

raincheck been off 43T for 6+ months - bad bad girl! :o)

I've just read your comment...

Somehow I havent seen your comment for how long…almost a year now! I hope you are still around on 43T to read my reply…sorry :)
Briefly, the story did NOT end there. In fact, it went on and on (getting worse and worse) until a month ago or maybe I should say until yesterday. Yes, because a month ago I finally became interested in a guy (who, btw, has crushed my heart too although briefly since our relationship is already over) and I HAD to stop seeing G because I’m not the kind of person to sleep with 2 guy at the same time. So I told him and dumped him for good. Yesterday, in a moment of desperation following the split up with this other guy, I met G again and, to my surprise, I realized how much I did not like him anymore and actually wonder how I can possibly have taken all that abuse by someone so degrading and, by now, unattractive. So, I’m cured! I’m also hopeful that I will soon recover from my latest relationship. I don’t get to be in a relationship very often: it took me 3 years to get rid of G and it only lasted one month and a half with Anthony. Now I’m back to be free and lonely but with my head up.
What about you?

seeking~serenity WOW!!! GOOD THINGS ARE HAPPENING. FAST!!! :)

I, too, have just read YOUR comment...

Oops, I missed tons of comments from the last several months, as I haven’t been around, so I completely understand…no biggie. I’m here now.

Sounds like you have been put through the ringer with these two relationships. It seems like you picked yourself up after the chaos. It’s amazing how you can come back to someone and rea;ize just how wrong you were in the beginning, and how much you are no longer attracted to someone!!! I have been there before. It’s rather interesting.

I am free also. Head to the sky! I have been single since last June…or July, not really sure. I used to count months that went by, either in a relationship or while being single, but I gave up doing that. I am waiting for a time when I am better-equipped to deal with the merging of two people. That, and I am also waiting for the RIGHT person to come along. No more being with what’s just in front of me!!

Happy and free! That’s me!

Are you still recovering? Have you now moved on? It’s been a little while. How goes it?

raincheck has gotten 2 cheers on this entry.


I want to:
43 Things Login