This topic is going to have to be done in drips and drabs. But, inspired by some reading I did online the last few days, I am ready to start to tackle it.
The dilemma: Which path to take?
Some experts say that you just have to force yourself to sit your ass down in the chair and write. So far, I have been unable to do so. Other experts, like the one I was reading about online recently, say that that kind of tough love approach will not work in the long run, because until we engage with the aspects of us that hold us back, we will never be able to succeed.
Frankly, I don’t know which path to follow.
The mean authority figure in me says, “Enough of this psychological bullshit. You don’t write because you are too lazy, that’s all. If you would just get some willpower and follow-through and self-discipline, then you would write.
It’s almost second nature for me to believe this voice, and blame myself for my inactivity in following my dreams.
But, but, but…. why can I be self-disciplined for some things, then? Why can I force myself to exercise when I don’t feel like it, and not force myself to write? I think that there may indeed be something holding me back, and until I confront that barrier, I will never make progress toward what I want to do.
However the meanie voice in me says, “Oh, please, you know that’s just a way for you to not challenge your laziness and not have to sit your ass down in the chair and write.”
So I don’t know who to believe and how to proceed. Confront my reluctance or just forge ahead past it?
Well, since I’m not writing anyway, I guess I can take some time to play with the idea of confronting the fears/barriers that make me not write. I have to put the little ones to bed now, so I’ll start taking on the demons in the next post.