on the scale of one to ten i have a life that scores 8 on being peaceful, i am an only child so no sibling drama (though i spent 80% of my life craving it) than i am kind of fond of being alone and i spent 50% of my waking hours on my laptop with headphones shoved up my ears, snapping at anyone who so much as attempts to speak to me, im pretty much successful at blocking out the world yet it doesnt seem enough.. i dont know what it is that im running from, i wasnt like this, i dont like being like this but i want peace rather i need peace.. writing gave me peace and today im writing after 2 weeks, i need peace so bad that its like my system is blocking away any and all contacts from the outer world.. i sit around thinking about nothing and liking it.. outwardly i am stagnant, completely still yet inwardly im restless.. i think im hoping that if i sit still enough,for long enough, some of the calm of my composure will penetrate to my inside via osmosis or something..
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