For those of you who have had young children, do you remember when your child learned to say “NO!” I thought that was so cute. But, somehow has we grow up, we say YES to the wrong things often and NO to the wrong things. How does that happen?

Both YES and NO, when used at the right times serve us so much.

Someone made a request of me, well, actually multiple requests of me. I love this person dearly and a part of me wants to oblige, but, in my heart, as the Holy Spirit speaks to me (no, it’s not in an audible voice), I’m prompted to not fulfill the requests.

Tonight I just briefly said I am unable to fulfill his requests because it’s in conflict with what God desires from me. My desire is first and foremost to please God above all else, even if that means disappointing others. He understood and there was no pressure.

I’ve been actively listening more to that still small voice God often speaks to me in my mind’s eye. Sometimes it’s so soft and quiet, that I have to be still to listen for it. Should I make that comment? Should I write that? Should I flirt?

I don’t want to embrace what the world says is feminine, but truly what God says is feminine. I was reminded yesterday as I dealt with a hard situation with my daughter. My first reaction was to be irate and come down harshly on her for her choices.

BUT, God popped a moment in time for me of my past, not as condemnation, but as a reminder that I was given a 2nd chance, and where I deserved harsh treatment, I got incredible love. That broke me. God used His kindness through my pastor and his wife to get through decades of pain I had carried and was unable to release until that time.

A godly woman told me last night, and the timing was so very perfect, about Proverbs 31 that a godly woman seeks after God when she wakes up, throughout the day, and ends it with God. She shared that when she wakes up, she asks God to search her heart, and what could she do to join in on God’s work that day, to guide her steps.

I wake up feeling so grateful and thanking God, worshiping Him. But, truthfully, I don’t ask Him to search my heart, and I just set up doing what my schedule says, rather than be opened to where He directs. Funny, a different friend of mine told me he did this last year. This is person #2.

A part of a woman managing her household, her life, her womanhood, her femininity, is to participate in what God is doing, having Him search her heart, reveal things that displease Him and allow Him to change, and to develop those things that are right to align more with Him.

So, I’m going to learn how to better embrace my femininity according to what the Bible says, to who God says I am. I’m not a man. God didn’t make me a man. I’m going to embrace who God made me to be.