The man I’m with right now.. we sure got some bumps on the road. But everytime we seem to overcome those bumps with good conversations. It seems and I hope this is true.. we have the most issues in the beginning and overcoming those makes us stronger. We sure did have a rough start but everytime we both make the choice to choose eachother. To choose to continue. I can not give up on this easily and I don’t even want to. He is unlike any other guy I’ve been with. Very sweet and caring. It’s not what I’m used to. He sure has his issues but he really progressed due to therapy. I’m very proud of him and thankfull to have something with him. Sometimes I can’t believe I really fell for such a nerd. He’s not the most handsome guy but he really does have an attractive personality and we are the same on many levels.
But I have this feeling, this anxiety, that I will not be the woman he will end up having a “long lasting relationship” with. I know he’s looking to settle, have a wife and kids and a dog..
Guess now I’m the one that experiences a bit of commitment fear. I don’t want to be years down the road and realize: hey I just wasted a lot of time of yours in which you could have met someone who really knows what she wants… But I’m thinking 10 steps ahead of me with a mixed up mind I know.